A View of Happiness
by A Shot of Amber
Summary: Serena never expected to see her life end with one stroke. She never expected to go to the party a little girl and leave a broken and battered women. She never exepected that picking up the pieces of her life would be so hard.
1. Default Chapter

A View of Happiness

Chapter One

By A Shot of Amber

When I started this story I had no meaning to portray this story the way I did. Then at just about the time Serena gets hurt I got hurt to by someone I thought was my friend. I started this story with different intentions but then I got hurt and this story took on a new meaning. This story is my life over these past few months moving into the past few days and all the events are true. Its like life is imitating art in some ways since everything that happens in this story has happened to me. I guess there is no way to question God's intentions.

In the meantime please don't forget to read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Tell me what you think! Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter One

I can remember my first day of school. I was a nervous newbie in her first day of college. The buildings were huge and full of strangers that I hoped to become friends with. Strange teachers that I would call by their first names and they would be fair and equal with me and strange students who would get to know and love me for who I am. I was excited about my first day of school and it must have showed as I walked across the grassy campus to the large brick building that would be my home for the next four years.

I carried a duffel bag full of my treasures from home along with a suitcase. My parents still had my other things in the car. I walked up the tiled and dirty white stairs to the forth floor where my room would be. Already kids were unpacking and moving in. They crowded the halls calling out greetings to each other and pushing past me on their way to another person's room. Me? I pushed past the crowds myself till I came to the room where I would be living. The door was closed but I could already hear music playing from inside. Suddenly I got scared wondering who my new roommate would be but I had always been friendly and cheerful in high school and I wasn't going to let that stop me now.

Serena Tuskino took a hold of the door knob and opened the door to reveal a white room with a window on the back wall and two beds also against it. One of the beds was taken and already made up with a white coverlet with green leaves on it and white sheets. The music was coming from a stereo set up on one of the desks, the one closest to the closet. Sitting in the window setting up a thing of essence was a girl dressed in a black mini skirt and a red sweater. Her long black hair hung over face but when she heard the door opening she looked and brushed the hair away.

"Hi," Serena said tentively while the girl looked at her than smiled and stood up.

"Hi, you must be Serena," the girl said walking over to Serena with her hand extended. "I'm your new roommate Rei Hino.

Serena dropped her duffel bag on the floor and shook Rei's hand. "Its nice to meet you Rei. Have you been here long?" Serena asked as she let go of Rei's hand and reached down to pick up her bag.

"I've been here since early morning," Rei replied walking back over to the window which offered a beautiful view of the school square. "I wanted to beat the rush and un-pack in peace."

"I can understand," Serena replied dropping her duffel bag on the other bed and sighing. "Its really crowded out there."

"It will get better, after the holiday break the hall starts to clear out with people moving or dropping out of school. The first year is always hard for everyone."

"Are you a first year?" Serena asked innocently.

"No this is my second year here. Still after winter break people start to drop out and it gets quieter."

"Wow! I hope I can make it," Serena replied plopping down on the bed and putting her hands in her lap.

"Oh you will. Just work hard and don't party to much and you can do it. I'm sure of it." Rei nodded her head and smiling at Serena.

"Knock knock!" Someone called knocking on the open door.

Rei and Serena both looked up too see two girls standing in the doorway with one of them still knocking on the door.

"Hi Mina, Lita," Rei said without getting up.

The two girls walked in with the blond one leading. "Hey Rei! You haven't come to see us yet," the blond girl chided while her brunette friend looked around the room.

"Rei you really need to decorate more, your room is so sparse!" The brunette girl cried out when she didn't see any posters of boys or movie stars.

"Lita you know I don't idolize false idols," Rei sighed shaking her head.

"Yea but your room is boring!" Lita replied.

"If it helps I have some posters of movie stars and guys," Serena cut in from where she sat on the bed.

Both Lita and Mina looked over at her and smiled. Mina was the first to talk. "Hi! You must be Rei's new roommate!" Mina walked over to Serena and plopped down on the bed next to her. "I'm Mina Anio and this walking stick is Lita Kino," Mina said pointing to Lita.

"I'm not a walking stick," Lita replied crossing her arms in mock anger.

"But your so thin! You look like a walking stick!" Mina cried. "If you ask me you need to eat more."

"And be fat like you?"

Mina gasped and stood up. "I'm not fat! For your opinion Lita Kino I look beautiful just the way I am!"

"If your going to fight please do it in your own room and leave us to peace," Rei sighed rubbing her forehead.

"Were not fighting," Mina replied turning towards Rei. "We are having a friendly discussion."

"Yea about Mina's big thighs," Lita added.

"I don't have big thighs!" Mina cried turning back to Lita.

"Are they always like this?" Serena asked Rei without taking her eyes off the fighting girls.

"I'm afraid so. I've known them since last semester and since this morning they've done nothing but fight." Rei replied.

"We don't fight," Lita said breaking into the conversation. "We just have polite disagreements."

"They sound very polite," Serena replied sarcastically.

Rei just smiled and laughed softy while Lita and Mina looked at each other and then broke in giggles themselves.

"Hey I have an idea!" Mina said breaking off the giggles and pointing one finger in the air. "Lets go and get some ice cream! I could use some chocolate."

"I don't know," Serena replied looking at the duffel bag on the floor. "I still have to grab my other things and un-pack."

"Oh come on Serena! If you spend your first day inside your room hiding you'll never make friends," Mina cried throwing out both her arms.

"She is right Serena, come out with us. You can un-pack later," Rei said softly looking over at Serena.

" Alright," Serena nodded her head and smiled. "It would be a good idea for me to know where the ice cream parlor is."

"Its not really an ice cream parlor as much as it's a coffee house with ice cream but still its nice," Lita replied.

"Who cares what it is! Lets go!" Mina grabbed Serena's arm and pulled her up off the bed. "The sooner we get there the sooner I can solve my craving for chocolate."

Rei got up off the window sill and followed the girls out into the hallway. Through the crowds Mina and Lita greeted different people with waves and quick hugs. Serena was silent except to say hi and to introduce herself to people who asked her name. Outside in the quad they walked over the granite sidewalk past large brick buildings which Rei pointed out and named. Soon though they came to a smaller building farther away from the larger brick buildings and off a street in a field of trees. The four girls walked into the small building which was full of students laughing and talking at white tables with metal kick proof legs. Some lounged on couches where the tables were made of wood and the atmosphere was quieter.

Mina led the girls up to the counter where a pretty blond girl stood wearing a red apron and ordered a waffle cone with chocolate ice cream.

"They have really good ice cream here," Mina said to Serena has the girl scooped up her ice cream into a cone.

"It looks good, I don't even know what to order," Serena replied biting her lip and looking up at the menu.

"One chocolate waffle cone," the server handed Mina her ice cream and turned to Serena. "What would you like?"

"Um I think I'll have a strawberry ice cream," Serena replied pointing to the tub of strawberry ice cream.

The server nodded and scooped up her ice cream before finishing off the other's orders. Together they paid and headed over to an empty table to eat their treats.

"So Serena what is your major?" Lita asked as she licked at a drop of peach ice cream.

"I'm an art major," Serena replied swallowing a cold bite down her throat.

" That's cool, I'm majoring in culinary arts myself so we might see each other in the liberal arts building."

"Which one is that?" Serena asked.

" That's the Hornung Art Building to the left and a few buildings down from the cafeteria," Rei replied.

"Oh okay I remember now. Boy is this going to be hard, I'll never remember all these buildings," Serena sighed.

" Relax, after a few days you'll get used to the campus and soon you'll be a pro at remembering where each building is," Mina replied patting her hand while looking over at another table full of people. "Hey there is Ami and Michiru! Yo guys over here! Its me Mina!"

Two girls looked up from the people they were talking to and smiled. The girl with aqua hair stood up and walked over to them. Serena was immediately awed by her graceful presence has she walked over to them dressed in a black sweater with a tan skirt that went to mid thigh over black tights.

" Michiru I haven't seen you all summer!" Mina cried reaching out one hand to grasp Michiru's hand and grinned up at her.

" That's because I was in England for a orchestra ceremony. I thought I told you last semester?"

"You did but I forgot," Mina grinned sheepishly and let go of Michiru's hand. "So how was the ceremony?"

"It was wonderful." Michiru looked over at Serena and smiled. "So who is your new friend? I don't think I've met her yet."

"I'm Serena Tuskino," Serena replied holding out one hand to shake.

"How do you do Serena. I'm Michiru Kaioh. I'm hoping you're an art major so I can get to know you better."

" Actually I am an art major," Serena replied shaking Michiru's hand and letting go.

Michiru's smile widened and she clapped her hands together. "That is wonderful! I was hoping to get to know you better and you know so is my friends," Michiru turned to the people sitting at her table and gestured to them. "Darien come on over and meet Serena."

Serena watched as a tall dark haired guy stood up and walked over to them. He was a nice looking boy wearing a red sweater and a pair of blue jeans.

" Darien Shields I want you to meet Serena Tuskino. Serena I wanted to introduce you because Darien has been staring at you since you came in here."

Serena could feel the heat fill her cheeks not for embarrassment for herself but instead for Darien who gave Michiru a dirty look then held out his hand to Serena. "I'm sorry about Michiru, she's a little abrupt," Darien replied.

"Its okay," Serena replied shaking his hand and looking into his eyes which she noticed were a deep blue. "I have friends like that at home myself."

"Yes and are they as much of a pain as Michiru is?" Darien asked letting go of Serena's hand and stepping back to shove his hands into his pockets.

"I don't know, I still have to get to know Michiru some more," Serena replied smiling up at him.

"Don't I have a say in this?" Michiru asked breaking into the conversation and crossing her arms over her chest.

"What do you have to say Michiru?" Darien asked turning to her.

"I'm not a pain and Darien wouldn't you like to tell Serena why I'm introducing you to her?"

Serena looked over at Darien who suddenly started to look nervous to Michiru who was smiling in a smug way. Darien looked at her then at Michiru but he never pulled his hands out of his pockets.

"Well seeing no answer I'll tell her. Serena, Darien wanted me to introduce you two because he thinks your pretty and would like to get to know you. Basically he wanted to ask you on a date but didn't know how."

Mina and Lita burst into giggles while Serena blushed and looked down at her ice cream cone. She didn't see Darien peer at her with a questioning look on his face. What he saw made him step back some more and look down at the ground.

"You know I better get going. I still have to buy my books," Darien muttered turning and walking off. Serena looked up from her half eaten cone to watch his retreating back disappear through the door as the bell above it tinkled while it closed. Mina and Lita stopped giggling while Rei looked at Serena with a sharp look.

Michiru was watching Darien leave to but now turned back to the girls and uncrossed her arms. "I guess I was to abrupt for him," Michiru said softly looking down at her hands.

"You know Michiru we better get going," Rei replied getting up out of the booth and holding out her hand to Serena. "Serena still needs to un pack."

Serena looked over at Rei and nodded her head before taking her hand and standing up also. Mina and Lita stood up also while looking at each other with confused looks.

"I'll see you guys later," Michiru said as the four girls headed towards the door.

"I'll call you later tonight!" Mina replied taking Lita's arm.

" Alright," Michiru replied nodding her head and watching the girls head out the same door that Darien had left just earlier.

"You know you are to abrupt."

Michiru turned to the tall blond women who had come up behind her and was now standing with one hand on her hip. "I was just telling the truth."

"Yea but did you see the look on the blonde's face? She isn't interested in Darien."

"How can she not be? Darien is gorgeous! I would think every girl in school would be interested in him and it's rare for Darien to like a girl. He's not that social."

The blond girl threw back her head and laughed. "If I didn't know right I would say that you have a crush on Darien."

"Oh Haruka you know I do not. I just want Darien to be happy, that is all," Michiru protested.

"And you think he would be happy dating someone who is not interested in him?"

"No, but she can learn to be interested in him. All she needs to see is him as her hero where he saves her and turns into a prince that she can love and adore."

"I think I see a matchmaker in progress," Haruka laughed.

"Maybe you do," Michiru replied with a sweet smile.

"Is college always that embarrassing?" Serena asked as she picked up a bundle of underwear and shoved them into a drawer.

"What do you mean?"

"Well its my first day of school and already I'm being asked out by a guy I'm not even interested in."

Rei sighed and uncrossed her legs. "That was just a fluke. Michiru is like that, she's kind of cunning and coy but she is really nice and so is Darien."

"Do you know Darien well?" Serena asked slamming the drawer closed and moving towards the box on her bed.

"Yea I do. He's a senior here earning a degree in engineering. He's really nice too, he's polite and likes to read and is really smart. He has a partial scholarship because he gets such fantastic grades."

Serena laughed and picked up a china rabbit figurine which she had just unwrapped. "I don't need all his merits, I just wanted to know what he was like." Serena set the figurine on her desk and smiled. "He seems like a nice guy and he is kind of cute but I'm looking for something better. I want a really popular guy who's like the big man on campus."

"Then you should date Derek Kizuzenshin, he's the most popular senior here."

" Really? What's he like?" Serena asked turning around with interest.

Rei tapped her chin with one hand while she thought. "Well he's tall and muscular. He always seems to have girls hanging around him and is known to be a big man around campus. He plays football on the football team and is also on the baseball team."

"Wow he sounds great," Serena sighed sitting down on her bed.

"He is cute," Rei concided, "but I don't know if he's that great. He seems kind of arrogant to me."

"All the better!" Serena replied throwing her arms up in the air.

"You like guys who are arrogant?" Rei asked looking slightly shocked.

"No, I don't necessarily like guys who are arrogant. I more like guys who are sure of themselves. I like confidence in a guy."

"Oh," Rei nodded her head then turned onto her side and went back to reading her book. Serena just smiled and got back to un packing things to put on her desk.

In the mean time please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you!


	2. A View of Happiness 2

A View of Happiness

Chapter Two

By A Shot of Amber

Thank you for coming back. I'm really glad to see you. I had fun writing this chapter because of the play of words in it. Read carefully and store them in your mind for later. The song has a real meaning point. Also please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to ! Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter Two

I somehow adjusted to school quite easily. When I wasn't in class I hung out with Rei, Lita, and Mina and sometimes Michiru and her roommate Haruka. Haruka was really cool, she was tall with short sandy blond hair and these really pretty ocean blue eyes. She was also Michiru's girlfriend. They had met their freshman year of college and been dating ever since then. I thought it was romantic that they could find each other and be so in love. I also thought it was lucky that they got to share a room, I would want to be with the one I love all the time also.

I also was becoming friends with this really smart girl named Ami Mizuno. She was helping me with my English Lit class which I was horrible at. She also got me into being friends with Darien. After the incident in the ice cream parlor I didn't see Darien for a few weeks until one day in the cafeteria when I was sitting alone studying for a test I had in an hour.

Serena crossed her legs in their tan panty hose and black combat boots. She wore a red plaid mini skirt and a white button up shirt opened to reveal a white tank top underneath. Serena liked to call this outfit her naughty catholic school girl uniform. She was studying from her notes for her Theology exam next period when someone suddenly set their tray on the table across from her. Serena looked up to see Darien standing above her wearing a black sweater and his book bag.

"Hey do you mind if I sit with you?"

"No not at all," Serena replied moving her book bag closer to her to make room for him.

Darien smiled and pulled off his bag before sitting down and setting it on the table. "I saw you sitting alone and I thought I'd give you some company."

" Wouldn't you want to sit with your friends though?" Serena asked looking around the cafeteria.

"I could but they are all in classes so I'm alone and was looking for company," Darien replied picking up his fork and spearing up some beans. "This cafeteria food looks horrible, more then usual," he looked at the beans and sighed.

Serena grinned and set her book on the table. "That's why I opted for the sandwich and the chips. I hate beans, actually I hate all vegetables especially carrots."

"But vegetables are good for you! Its cake and those sweets you need to stay away from," Darien replied pointing his empty fork at her. " You should especially stay away from ice cream. Its proven to lead people away from a healthy diet onto a road of rotting teeth and extra pounds."

"I'm already on that road. I love cake, especially my mom's cake. She makes the best strawberry short cake in the world."

"Is your mom close by?"

"Yea, my whole family lives in the next town over. That's the reason I picked this school, I wanted to be close so I could go home whenever I want," Serena replied picking up a chip and eating it.

"Since you are so close to home do you go home every weekend?" Darien asked taking a bite of his burger.

"So far not. I've been really busy on the weekends hanging out with friends and with homework, also I don't want to go home and get out of the swing of things. I really like school and I figured going home would just make me homesick so I'm trying to stay here as much as possible."

"Then you heard about the party on Saturday at the fraternity house?"

Serena looked up from her plate. "The one that Phi Sigma Kappa is holding?"

"Yes, I'm in that fraternity myself. My brothers are having the party to celebrate homecoming week."

"Yea, I guess homecoming is a big thing here. I'm supposed to be going to the game with Mina, Lita, and Rei."

" Homecoming is really big but so is the party. It's the night after the game. All the brothers are supposed to bring dates and I was wondering if maybe you would like to--."

"Oh my gosh I love this song!" Serena cried interrupting him.

"What song?" Darien asked looking up at the ceiling where Serena was looking.

"This song! I love this song! _You Don't Know My Name_ by Alicia Keys."

"You interrupted me for a song?" Darien asked incredulity but softly.

"What did you say?" Serena asked looking back to him.

" Nothing," Darien replied shaking his head as he saw his fraternity brother Derek enter the cafeteria followed by a stream of adoring female fans. Derek waved and smiled to people sitting at tables while the whole time walking towards Serena and Darien.

Serena turned around to see what Darien was looking at and a big smile spread on her face.

"Oh my gosh that's Derek Kizuzenshin," Serena breathed turning to look behind her at Derek who was making his way towards their table.

Derek was giving a high five to a fellow football player when he spotted a glum looking Darien and a starry eyed Serena. He smiled his widest smile and walked over to them in his blue football jersey.

" Shields! Its good to see you!" Derek slapped Darien on the back then turned to Serena and winked at her. "And who is this beautiful women you are sitting with?"

"Its good to see you too Derek. This is Serena Tuskino. Serena this is one of my fraternity brothers Derek Kizuzenshin," Darien replied pointing his hand first to Serena then to Derek.

"Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful eyes?" Derek asked leaning close to Serena and giving her a charming smile.

"No, no one has but thank you," Serena replied smiling up at him then added. "I've heard all about you from my friends. They say you are a star football player of the football team."

"Yes I am. I'm actually captain of the team too and the president of my fraternity's chapter here. Are you coming to the party we are holding this weekend?"

"I just heard about it and I hope to be going," Serena replied happily.

" Great, maybe I'll see you there," he winked at her then straightened up and headed off with his groupies. "See you at the house Shields!"

"Yea see you there," Darien replied waving one limp hand then looking up at Serena who was starry eyed and watching Derek walk off. He sighed softly then stood up with his tray of half eaten food. "I'm have to get to class now, but if you like, do you want me to walk you to your class?"

Serena broke out of her daze and looked up at Darien. "Sure that would be great," she replied standing up also and picking up her tray and her book bag. Together they deposited their trays and walked out of the cafeteria into the bright sunlight of the day.

"So you were thinking about going to the party this weekend?" Darien asked hiking his bag up on his shoulder.

"Yea, it sounds like fun except I don't have a date so I may seem out of place there," Serena replied jutting her books out from her waist.

"Well if you like I can be your date," Darien replied looking at her from the side.

Serena stopped in her tracks causing Darien to stop also. She was standing a little ahead of him looking at the building in front of her while Darien watched her back with the two long ponytails of hair falling down to her knees. She slowly turned around and looked straight into his eyes and spoke.

" Darien do you have a crush on me?"

Darien did a double take at this question and pulled his book bag higher up on his shoulder. He did answer the question though with a question of his own.

"Why do you ask?"

Serena sighed and shifted her books slightly in her arms. "Because from the first day I've met you everyone has told me you want to date me and then today you asked me out."

" What's wrong with asking a girl out? As a matter of fact what's wrong with asking you out?"

"There is nothing wrong except that I don't want to go out with you," Serena lifted up her books into the crook on one arm and shifted her weight onto one leg. "You're a really nice guy Darien and yea you are kind of cute but you are not my type. I'm looking for someone who's a go-getter and your not that type. Now I would like for us to be friends but that's it and if you're not interested in that then I guess I have no choice but to be sad, because I always could use a friend instead of a boyfriend." Serena half turned her body and looked back at Darien. "I'm sorry if this hurts you but I have to be truthful." Serena looked over at the building in front of her then back to Darien. "I've got to get to class. I'll see you later." With that she turned and walked off leaving Darien standing in the middle of the sidewalk watching her. Anyone passing by could see the look of slight shock on his face as she disappeared into the crowd. That was unexpected.

"Do you know anything about Derek Kizuzenshin?" Serena asked Rei later that night while the two of them sat at their desks working on homework.

Rei set down her pen and turned around in her chair. "Why do you ask?"

Serena set down her pen also and turned to face Rei. "I met him today while I was at lunch. I have been kind of wanting to get to know him but he's always surrounded by people so its hard to get him alone."

"What do you want to know?"

Serena propped her elbow on her chairs back and rested her head on her hand. "I just want to know if he has a girlfriend and if he would be willing to go to a party with me. I was thinking about asking him but if he has a girlfriend then I don't want to."

Rei blinked once at Serena looking into her eyes which stared back at her waiting and eager. Finally she spoke. "Serena I don't think it would be a great idea to ask Derek to a party or anything. He's a player and a big one at that. He uses girls like they are bottles of water, when he's done with one he throws it away and goes on to another. He would just use you for sex and then when he's done he'll leave and never come back."

"What do you mean?" Serena asked.

"He's a player, lets face it, he is. He'll go to the party with you, expect you to get drunk and sleep with him. Then when he is done he'll get up and leave you and never talk to you again. There is no point in you getting hurt by him, instead you should just leave him alone and go out with a better guy, a real man."

"Rei are you saying that I'm not worth having Derek?" Serena asked getting up out of her chair.

"No, I'm not saying your not worth having him. What I'm saying is that he's not worth having you. He's a player Serena and with your views you two wouldn't work. I don't want you to get hurt and with him you will be. Where are you going?"

Serena stopped at the doorway and looked over her shoulder. "I need a study break, I'm going to go and see Mina." With that Serena opened the door and stepped into the hallway closing the door behind her.

The hallway was crowded with people talking and standing in front of their doors while others sat inside their rooms at desks studying. Serena walked past them waving and saying hello to the people who cried out her name and waved back. Mina's room was down below her's so she headed down the stairs onto the second floor towards Mina's door which was open. Inside Mina sat at her desk writing on a piece of paper but she did look up when Serena knocked on the door and smiled happily.

"Hey girl! Come on in. Lita is at the library."

"She's still studying for that test?" Serena asked walking into the room and sitting down on Mina's bed.

"Yea, she's nervous as can be about it. She wants to get a good grade so she spends every free minute studying for it. Thankfully the test is tomorrow and then she can relax."

" That's good," Serena replied pleating the end of the blanket together while Mina watched her.

"So what did you want to talk about? Because if there is nothing I really need to work on my English homework."

"How did you know there is something I want to talk about?"

" Because you look nervous and if you just wanted to gossip you would have stayed upstairs with Rei."

"Oh yea," Serena nodded and let go of the blanket. "Do you know Derek Kizuzenshin?"

"Heck yea! The hot blond football player that is in my dreams every night?" Mina replied with a big smile on her face.

Serena sighed in slight relief and grinned at Mina. "I finally got to talk to him yesterday and oh my gosh Mina he is gorgeous! I was thinking about asking him to the frat party this weekend but Rei doesn't seem to think that is a good idea."

"Why not? He's hot! You two would make a great couple!"

"She says he's a player and a pimp," Serena replied. "She says I'll get hurt by him and that I shouldn't ask him out because our views will clash."

"What are your views?" Mina asked resting her chin on her folded arms.

"What do you mean?"

"What are your views on sex and stuff like that? Rei was obviously talking about that."

Serena blushed slightly at the question but she did think about it. Finally she answered. "I believe that you should have sex only after you are married. It makes it more special when you save it for the man you love."

" That's a good view," Mina replied nodding her head. "I don't really know Derek except that he has a reputation of being a player. He may not have the views you have though."

"Are you going to tell me that I shouldn't date him also?" Serena asked rising slightly from the bed.

"No of course not! Sit down!" Mina replied shaking her hand at Serena. " I think you should totally ask him out." Suddenly her eyes lit up. "Maybe you'll be the girl who tames his wild heart and he will fall in love with you just like in those romance books."

Serena's eyes lit up also and she looked up at the ceiling. "Wouldn't that be romantic if I was the one for him? I can see it now with us falling in love and getting married. That's what I want in life, to meet a wonderful man and to fall in love and get married."

"And that man is Derek Kizuzenshin," Mina sighed happily.

"It sounds wonderful doesn't it?" Serena asked looking back at Mina.

"Yea it does. So are you going to ask him out?"

"Yes I am," Serena stood up and brushed off her skirt. "I'm going to ask him tomorrow to the party and hope that he says yes!"

"You go girl!" Mina replied flashing a thumbs up sign. "And now that you've made up your mind I have to get back to my homework or I'll be a sophomore forever which I don't really want."

Serena smiled and headed towards the door. "Thanks for the advice Mina. I'll report back to you his answer tomorrow."

"He better say yes," Mina replied in a mock serious voice.

"Oh he will or else I'll pester him till he does," Serena giggled before closing the door behind her.

The next day found Serena standing in the middle of the quad. She was dressed in her best, a black mini skirt to show off her legs, a white tank-top because it was hot outside. Her book bag was slung over both shoulders and her books in her arms. She looked around her; there was an hour before her next class, looking for Derek. Mina had said that Derek usually walked through the quad after his first class headed to his next one. All around her people walked past talking and laughing or sitting on the benches scattered underneath the trees.

Serena was starting to feel frustrated when someone called her name causing her to turn around. Her heart perked up at the thought that it was Derek coming to look for her but it wasn't. Instead it was Darien dressed in a pale blue shirt coming towards her with his book bag slung over one shoulder.

"Hey Serena, what are you doing here alone?" Darien asked coming to a stop and smiling down at her.

Serena blushed as she remembered yesterday's conversation with Darien but he obviously didn't remember. He was smiling down at her with a boyish grace.

"Hi Darien. I was just waiting for someone," Serena replied looking away from his blue eyes. For some reason they were making her feel odd. "Don't you have a class now?"

"No. I'm done for a couple hours. I was going to go back to the house and get some lunch. "What about you?"

Serena looked past him to see if she could spot Derek but he was no where in sight so she looked back at Darien. "I was just waiting for someone before my next class," she replied.

"One of your friends?"

"Yea something like that," Serena replied tightening her arms around her books.

Darien nodded and reached up to rub the back of his head. "You know Serena I want to apologize about yesterday. I didn't mean to put you on the spot in any way. I understand if you don't want to go with me to the frat party,"

"Yo Shields!" Someone called.

Serena turned around has Darien looked up to see Derek walking towards them dressed in his football jersey again waving to him. Suddenly a smile lit up on Serena's face which Darien did not fail to notice.

"Hey yesterday's pretty girl," Derek said walking up to Serena and smiling down at her with his blond hair falling slightly into his brown eyes.

"Hi Derek," Serena replied stuttering slightly but quickly cleared her throat and straightened up. "I'm glad you are here. I wanted to ask you a question."

"Oh yea? What is it?" Derek laughed looking back at his buddies standing in a circle near him.

"Well I was thinking about the party your fraternity is holding and I know you are going and I am going and I would like to know if you want to go together?"

Derek stopped laughing and looked into Serena's eyes. He was looking at her with something a keen to amusement. Serena looked back at him with her heart on her face, eager and waiting. Suddenly he was smiling again and laughing slightly. "Yea I would like that..."

" Serena," Serena replied.

"Yea Serena. I would like that. I'll meet you at the frat house on Saturday at seven sharp since I don't know where your dorm is."

"I could tell you if you want," Serena began but was cut off by Derek.

" That's okay, we'll have time for that later. Just meet me at the party." With that he chucked her under the chin and walked off with his buddies laughing and telling them something that caused a burst of laughter.

"I don't think that's a good idea Serena."

Serena turned around away from Derek's distant back to see Darien looking down at her with a concerned look on his face.

"What do you mean?" Serena asked.

"Derek is a player and a pimp. Did you see that look he gave his buddies when you asked him to the party? He's going to use you and embarrass you if not something worse."

"What is worse? We are just going to the party together. It's not like we are going to sleep together in one of the upstairs bedrooms," Serena replied.

"Derek expects a lot from the women he dates. If your not ready for him you are going to regret this whole date. I don't want to see you get hurt and I'm afraid with Derek you will get hurt."

"Stop, please," Serena held out one hand and shook her head. "Nothing is going to happen with us. We are just going to go to the party, have a good time, and maybe kiss goodnight. He is not going to hurt me. Didn't you see the way he looked in my eyes? He is going to treat me right."

" Serena," Darien began.

"No please stop. I don't need you worrying about me when I can take care of myself. It's not like you are my boyfriend." Suddenly Serena stopped as she looked into Darien's face and cringed slightly. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. I didn't mean to hurt you Darien but I can take care of myself. I'm a big girl." Serena looked at her watch then behind her and back at Darien. "I have to go to class now but I'll see you later." She smiled up at him and walked off towards the art building while Darien watched.

"I'm not worried about you taking care of yourself Serena, I'm worried that you won't be strong enough for him." Darien muttered to him self as Serena disappeared into the crowd.

Chapter three will be out next week. In the meantime please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you!


	3. A View of Happiness 3

A View of Happiness

Chapter Three

By A Shot of Amber

Hey all! I want to warn you that the chapter ahead is really dark. I'm talking really really really dark. This chapter actually sets the base for this story, the beginning chapters were just setting up for this chapter and what happens afterwards. I want you to know that you've been warned. I'll be discussing the chapter and my views at the end. I've warned you the best I can without ruining this chapter so please take that into consideration.

In the meantime please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter Three

"How about this?"

Serena turned away from the mirror to look at the shirt Mina was holding up. "I don't know, I don't really look good in orange."

Mina looked at the shirt for a second then dropped it on the floor. " Alright no orange."

"You know Mina do you think that Serena will fit in your clothes?" Rei asked from Lita's bed where she sat.

"What do you mean?" Serena asked.

"Well Mina is a little taller then you so you many not fit in her shirts or jeans."

"Who cares about that? If the clothes are too tight then she can show off some skin!" Mina replied. "And has you know skin is sexy."

Serena nodded her head and turned back to the mirror. "Its not like I'm going ala Christina Aguilera and wearing some straps of cloth across my boobs and a skimpy skirt." Serena turned around just as Mina looked up from the floor where she was kneeling.

" Blue!" Both girls shouted and dived into the closet while Rei gave them a confused look. "Blue?" She asked.

"This one should be perfect! A nice baby blue sweater to make him think maternal thoughts." Mina cried holding up a pale blue fuzzy sweater.

"Yes!" Serena cried taking the sweater and hugging it. She then stood up and pulled off her pink top and pulled on the blue one. "What do you think?" Serena turned around and held out her arms.

" Perfect!" Mina said giving her a thumbs up.

"It is cute," Rei added.

" Great," Serena turned around and smoothed out the sweater. "I have the perfect plaid skirt to go with it too. I think I'll go and get it now. How much time do I have left?"

"Two hours," Rei replied looking at the clock near Lita's bed.

"Then I have to get cracking. I want to try something new with my hair."

"I'll help you," Mina replied standing up and following Serena out of the room.

Rei watched the two walk out and stood up obviously left behind and headed out of the room too closing the door behind her.

"So who are you coming to the party with?" Andrew asked catching his football in the air and looking at Darien.

"No one, I'm just going stag," Darien replied fixing his shirt collar so it hung just right.

"Stag? You? The most handsome guy at our high school? What happened to that girl you've been talking about? The blond one? Serena?"

"She's already got a date. She's going with Derek."

Andrew sat up and placed the ball in his lap. "Derek Kizuzenshin? The player of school? Does she know what she's getting herself into?"

Darien turned around and leaned against the dresser. "I doubt he would do anything to Serena. She's a freshman; you don't expect things like that from a freshman."

"Yea but this is also Derek Kizuzenshin and if you know him you know that he is a major player who expects a girl to put out on the first date, especially if she has a few drinks in her."

"Do you think he'll do that to Serena?" Darien asked nervously.

"You never know, he may. I've never seen Serena but if she is pretty he'll be all over her," Andrew replied.

Darien turned back to the mirror and looked into it. "Serena is pretty, she's beautiful. She's full of dreams. Anyone who meets her will see that. She's like an angel, perfect and beautiful. Derek won't do anything to her...and if he does I'll punch his light outs."

Andrew laughed and threw the football in the air. "Sounds good but if he does see the beauty in her I say keep an eye out for her. If you see them heading up stairs then take the back way and stop them, even if that means butting in."

"Yea, I'll keep my eye out for her. With me in charge nothing will happen."

"Isn't this great?" Serena asked Rei as she looked around at the people dancing and laughing with red plastic cups in their hands.

"It's a little loud," Rei replied sticking one finger in her ear.

"But that's the best!" Mina cried from next to Rei as she shook her hips and swung her cup through the air.

"So where's Derek?" Lita asked from next to Mina.

"He went to get me a drink," Serena replied looking around the room and spotting Darien. "Hey Darien!" She cried waving her arm.

Darien smiled as he spotted her and moved through the crowd holding a bottle of beer in one hand and wearing a pink shirt unbuttoned at the top. " Hey Serena. How are you guys doing?"

"The music is a little loud," Rei replied crossing her arms over her chest and looking around her.

"Don't listen to her, the music is great," Mina replied shaking her head and shaking her hips.

"How are you doing Serena?" Darien asked looking down at her and noticing the lack of drink in her hand with a smile.

"I'm great! This is so exciting!" Serena cried looking around her at the dancing people.

" Where's Derek?"

"He went to get me a drink," Serena replied looking past Darien to see Derek coming over to them with two cups in his hand. "There he is!" She cried happily.

Darien turned to see Derek walking toward them with a big grin on his face.

"Hey Shields!" Derek called stepping up next to him and smiling at him before turning to Serena. "Here is your drink beautiful."

Serena smiled back and took the cup from him and took a sip while Derek grinned down at her before taking a sip of his drink.

"What is this?" Serena asked.

"Its beer, have you ever had it?" Derek replied.

"No, it tastes kind of funny though," Serena said taking another sip.

"Beer does taste funny," Mina replied reaching out to pat Serena's arm.

"You know you don't have to drink it if you don't want too," Darien said as Jessica Simpson came on.

"Hey who is playing this crappy music!" Someone yelled from nearby.

"Turn it!" A bunch of people chimed in.

"I don't mind the beer," Serena replied taking another sip.

Derek reached over and took Serena's hand. "Come on Serena lets go out back and see what's going on out there. I feel stifled here by the drinking police," Derek said giving Darien a look.

" Okay," Serena replied throwing a smile to her friends as she headed off through the crowd while Darien turned around and watched her disappear.

"How nervous are you about her?" Rei asked.

"Too nervous. I don't trust him," Darien replied turning back to the girls.

"What do you mean?" Mina asked looking around at them.

"He might pull a move on Serena," Lita replied.

"The thing is how soon?" Rei asked looking over at Lita.

"Who knows. I doubt he spiked her drink, he's not that smart but he might get her drunk and take her upstairs," Darien replied.

"Then its agreed, we split up and look after her for the rest of the night. That means no dancing and flirting but instead you need to stay sober and keep an eye out for her. We don't want her to get hurt," Rei said looking at everyone including Mina who was pouting slightly.

" Alright," she agreed nodding her head and walked off towards the backyard where Serena and Derek had gone.

"Do you think she'll listen?" Darien asked the remaining girls.

"I'm sure she'll listen, Mina's a good person," Lita replied nodding her head.

The others nodded and headed off in different directions.

How long had it been since she took her first sip of her drink? Serena felt funny. She felt dizzy and hot, unbelievably hot like she was boiling up from inside. She also felt bumpy like she was bouncing up and down but not sure why. Slowly it came to her that the bumping was the car moving underneath her, she was in the passenger seat of someone's truck while it drove over a bumpy road.

Suddenly the bumping stopped as the brakes squealed and the car came to a stop in an empty parking lot. Serena fell forward against the dashboard then fell back against the seat again. Now she felt cold like she was made of ice, her limps felt heavy, too heavy to move. She couldn't even move as someone moved over next to her and placed their arm around her shoulders.

"Don't worry baby I won't hurt you," someone mummered in her ear.

Serena turned her head to see Derek looking over her. He gently pushed her down into the seat pressing her shoulder against the worn leather.

"Don't worry baby," he mummered again.

The dizzy feeling was growing worse but not worse enough to keep understanding from dawning on her. Serena began to scream and cry and tried to push him away but it didn't work, he was to strong on top of her pushing her down and down into the seat. Suddenly he wasn't so gentle as she began to cry, he reached up and ripped the shoulder of her sweater, the soft wool tearing and hanging in tatters. His other hand pulled at her skirt pulling it away from her body. She continued to scream and tried to claw at his face.

"Stop screaming!" Derek yelled taking a hold of her hands and pinning them above her. "You should know better then that!" With his other hand he slapped her face so hard that she cried out in pain as she saw stars above her.

Then suddenly she stopped screaming as a heavy darkness fell over her. Her head slumped to the side and her arms weakened and slipped out of Derek's hand. He smiled and let go of her, it was about time.

"Have you seen her?" Rei gasped as she came to stop in front of Darien and Lita.

"No, I haven't, she just disappeared," Lita replied.

"Did you check upstairs?" Rei asked looking at Darien.

"Yea, I checked every room but she wasn't up there."

" Guys!" Mina cried running up to them and coming to stop next to Darien. "I just heard that someone brought roofies to the party and gave some to Derek."

"Do you think?" Lita asked looking around.

"Oh my god," Rei breathed. "What if he slipped one into her drink?"

The others looked at her with looks of horror except Mina who was thinking with a concerned look on her face. Suddenly he eyes lit up with horror. "Guys do you remember how Serena said that her drink tasted funny? What if he did slip one in?"

Darien stood there in silence for a moment then turned and headed off.

" Darien where are you going?" Rei called.

"To find Serena and make sure she's safe!" He yelled back heading for the back porch.

She came to in the darkness. The ground beneath her was cold and sort of wet. Why was the ground wet? Shouldn't it be warm and dry like in the car? What happened to worn leather and a bumpy ride?

Serena sat up raising herself up with her arms to look around at the dark alley where she lay. The ground was cold because she was lying on concrete near a puddle of water. Her shirt was ripped with a huge tear in the sleeve where his hands had ripped the cloth away.

Serena looked down to see her skirt was torn and hanging from her waist erratically. There was also blood staining the bottom of the hem near her legs and smeared on her thighs. Serena moved her legs and stood up feeling soreness down there. She began to walk, stumbling slightly as she made her way out of the alley feeling the soreness grow stronger. She stumbled on a rock and fell down taking the impact with her hands and felt the gravel dig into them. She knew what had happened, those last few moments before she passed out.

Serena stood up again as she began to cry, the hot tears running down her face. Out of the darkness of the alley into the light of the street where a street light shone down on her. Serena was sobbing now as she looked around her to see a couple watching her from the corner. Their eyes were wide in surprise to see the dirty torn girl stumble out of an alley. From across the street a person sitting near the window looked up from their meal to see her enter the light. Their stares seemed to bore into her like his eyes watching and judging. They could see what happened and yet they did nothing, she was completely alone in the world. Suddenly Serena couldn't take it anymore, she fell to her knees and started to scream, a raw jagged scream that came from the depths of her soul.

After Serena passed out on the street someone called for an ambulance. They came immediately to find a group crowded around the still girl lying on the pavement.

"Move back folks and let us do our job," one of them said breaking through the crowd and kneeling next to the still girl. He gently picked up her wrist to feel for a pulse when suddenly her eyes sprang open and she looked up at him. The ambulance driver stepped back a little at the wild look in her eyes. Serena sat up and looked around her with fear. Who were these strange people standing around her? Suddenly she spotted a man with blond hair like Derek's looking down at her. Serena began to scream and point at him.

"Oh my god no! He's back! Help me! Please help me! He's going to hurt me again! He's going to kill me! I know it! Oh god no!"

The ambulance driver looked at his partner who nodded and climbed back into the ambulance and pulled something out of a drawer. He filled the syringe with liquid then climbed back out and walked over to his partner who was trying to calm Serena who was crying in fear.

"Miss please calm down. No one is going to hurt you."

"Oh god no!" Serena sobbed while the other ambulance driver took her arm and injected it with the sedative.

"Calm down miss. You need to calm down or you'll pass out."

"I wish I would. I wish I was dead," Serena sobbed softly as the sedative took control and she fell into a drugged sleep. This gave the ambulance drivers a chance to lift her on to a gurney and put her into the ambulance. A police officer had arrived at this point and was asking people questions about the strange girl who had passed out on the pavement. Meanwhile Darien and the girls had left the party and were searching the campus for Serena who was still missing.

I'll be back next week with the next chapter. Like I warned this chapter was very dark and really sets up the rest of the story. I wrote this chapter before I got hurt myself but I can see now that a lot of the things that happened to me happened to her. I was slipped a drug also but I woke up at the wrong time just like she did. I guess it's a sort of life imitating art thing since this chapter was written a few weeks before I got hurt.

Anyway please read and review or send all comments, questions, flames, and suggestions to . Thank you.


	4. A View of Happiness 4

A View of Happiness

Chapter Four

By A Shot of Amber

I'm glad to see you back after what happened in the last chapter. Please be kind and read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, comments, and flames to . Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter Four

I came to in the hospital to see people looking down on me. As my vision became clearer I saw my parents standing at the foot of the bed. Next to me was a balding man wearing a white coat and carrying a clipboard. His wrinkled features crinkled into a smile when he saw my eyes open.

"Good morning Serena. I'm glad to see the drug is finally wearing off."

"Where am I?" Serena asked wearily.

"Oh Serena! Are you okay?" Mrs. Tuskino cried grasping her hands together.

"Don't worry Mrs. Tuskino. She'll be fine. The drugs she took didn't do any damage to her body. She'll be perfectly alright in a few days," the doctor replied reassuringly but turned back to Serena with a grave look. "Serena do you remember what happened?"

"I remember the party," she began hesitantly as the memories came back to her. "I remember taking my drink and leaving the party and being in the car and..." Serena stopped as she remembered being in the car and what happened before she passed out. Tears began to flow down her face and she broke into sobs and covered her face with her hands.

"As I thought. You do remember," the doctor said gravely. "Serena we were able to take a vial of semen out of you. We also tested your blood and you tested positive for Rohypnol which is also known as Roofies or the date rape drug. You were probably slipped the drug in your drink and then while you were starting to feel the affects driven away from the party. The man who slipped you the pill was probably also the man who raped you."

At this Mrs. Tuskino stifled a sob while Serena looked at the doctor in wide eyed horror.

" Serena I have an officer here who would like to talk to you and help get information on the man who raped you. He is right outside if you want to talk to him."

Serena who had began to cry again shook her head and pulled the blanket up to her chin. "No! I don't want to talk to him! He'll prosecute me for drinking! He'll say its my fault and tell me I should have known better! I don't want to see him!"

The doctor exchanged looks with the Tuskinos then turned back to Serena. "All right Serena then we won't do this now. Still you will probably want to talk to an officer soon and report this. Rape is a crime not for you but for the person who did this to you. In the mean time I suggest we leave you alone. The nurses' will want to do some more tests before we can discharge you."

Serena nodded silently and wiped away her tears. The doctor turned and headed for the door with the Tuskinos when Serena spoke up. "Mom could you call my friends and tell them where I am? I don't want them to worry."

Mrs. Tuskino turned around and smiled. "They are in the waiting room. Someone found a number in your purse and got a hold of your roommate Rei. Would you like to see them?"

"They are here? Now? How long have they been here?" Serena asked sitting up in bed.

" They've been here all night with us," Mr. Tuskino replied.

"Can I see them then?"

The doctor looked at her gravely then smiled and nodded. "I'll send them in now Serena. The nurses can do the tests later."

"Thank you," Serena replied lowering herself back onto the bed and pulling her blanket back up to her neck.

The doctor and her parents left the room closing the door behind them while Serena looked out the window at the still dark sky. It was early in the morning right before the sun would rise, how long ago had she been at the party innocently drinking a beer? How long had it been since Derek left her unconscious in a alley while he drove off probably to brag to his friends about his easy lay?

Serena stifled a sob as a tear ran down her face while the door opened. She quickly wiped away the tear and sat up in bed smiling at her friends who came in silently. Rei was still dressed in her party outfit a red dress with black fishnet stockings up to her thighs. After her came Mina who was holding a bouquet of red roses along with Lita who was holding a bunch of balloons. Behind all of them came Darien still dressed in his wrinkled shirt and khaki's with a worried look on his face.

"Hey girl," Mina said softly walking over to the bed with the others.

"Hi everyone," Serena replied moving the blanket down to her lap and smiling at her friends.

"These are for you," Lita said handing Serena the balloons. "We raided the hospital gift shop and bought a dozen balloons."

Serena laughed softly and took the balloons which were colorful with get well signs, hearts, and smiley faces. "Thank you, they are beautiful."

"These are also for you," Mina took the balloons from Serena and in their place handed her the bouquet of roses. "Darien thought you might like them."

Serena looked at the roses in her arms and smiled then looked up at Darien who was standing at the foot of the bed looking at her with worried eyes.

"Thank you Darien, they are beautiful," she replied smiling at him.

Darien nodded his head. "I thought you might like red roses."

"I do."

Rei lifted the bag she was holding up and rested it on the bed. "I brought you a change of clothes so you don't have to wear your dirty ones home."

Everyone exchanged looks at this but remained silent.

"Thank you," Serena replied resting one hand on the bag then removing it as she saw the scrapes on the palm.

Mina was crying silently and drying her eyes with a tissue while Lita and Rei looked at her at the scrapes on her palms to the black and blue mark on her face.

"Does it hurt?" Lita asked gesturing to the mark on her face.

Serena reached up and touched the mark, it hurt to touch but she smiled and shook her head. "Not that much."

"I can't believe he did that to you," Darien growled clenching his hands into fists in his pockets.

" Darien please don't," Rei said softly shaking her head no.

Darien didn't say anything but instead just looked at Serena who was looking back at him. Finally she sighed and looked back at Rei. " How did you guys find me?"

Rei sighed also and took a seat in the chair next to the bed. "After you and Derek left we started searching for you. We didn't know that you had left..."

After he had searched the house without success he headed for the back porch to where she had last been. He was worried about the rumor he had heard. What if Derek had slipped Serena some drugs? She may be in danger at this very moment!

He pushed past some people making out near the door and walked out onto the back porch. Near a tree a group of his fraternity brothers stood drinking and talking. The only way to know the truth was to go through them. Darien headed towards them and called to one of them who would probably tell the truth.

"Hey Todd!"

Todd looked up and grinned. "Yo Darien! Where's your hot date? I thought you'd be upstairs with her getting it on."

"You know I don't have a date but I am looking for one. A certain girl named Serena, have you seen her?"

" Serena?" Todd asked looking up at the sky. "You mean the blond girl with the strange hairstyle?"

"Yea, I'm looking for her. I wanted to tell her something," Darien replied trying to keep the tenseness out of his voice.

"Your too late man. She left with Derek a little while ago. I don't know where they were headed off to but she looked tanked."

" Tanked has in drunk or tanked as in drugged up?"

"Wow, I don't know. She looked tanked as in drunk I guess. She was stumbling and complaining that she was dizzy and hot but that could just mean that she was drunk."

Darien nodded and looked around at the people standing around him. "Todd did you hear about someone bringing roofies to the party?"

"Yea Derek was bragging that he brought some and was even passing them around. Wait! Do you think that he slipped your girl some?"

" That's exactly what I think," Darien replied heading back towards the glass doors.

" What's up with Darien?" Someone asked.

"He thinks that Derek slipped his girl roofies," Todd replied.

"You mean that blond girl that was with Derek earlier?"

"Yea."

"Oh man that girl is getting her do's right now! He slipped her a pill earlier and she actually drank it! She's probably out and unconscious right now and in his car."

Todd looked at the guy standing next to him then back at the door where Darien had disappeared. "I hope he finds her soon."

" Darien! Did you find her?" Rei asked as he walked past her with an intent look on his face.

" Gather the girls, we are leaving," Darien replied tensely.

"Did he?" Rei began.

"Yes he did."

"Oh God," Rei groaned then turned and ran into the other room to get Mina and Lita while Darien pulled out his car keys and walked out the front door towards his car parked on the street.

"I got the call from the hospital that you were here while we were driving around looking for you. Your parents called me and told me what had happened. That must have been at about 2am. We came here and met your parents in the waiting room. You were still unconscious and they were performing tests when we got here so we waited in the waiting room till now when they let us in."

"How long were you searching for me?"

"Maybe for an hour when I got the call," Rei replied. "We came straight here after that," Rei took Serena's hand which was resting on top of the cover. "I'm so sorry that this happened to you."

"I agree, no one deserves this," Lita added from where she stood next to Rei.

Serena nodded as tears began to form in her eyes. She was still sore down there and she could feel the mark on her face throbbing in pain. Darien and Mina both noticed this. Mina looked over at Darien then stepped forward and placed her hand on Rei's shoulder.

"You know we should get going and allow Serena to get some sleep."

Serena shook her head and wiped away the tears. "Actually I don't want to be alone right now. You guys can stay, it would be great if you did."

Darien who hadn't spoken for awhile looked at her then nodded his head and smiled, the first smile from him she had seen all night since it had happened. "How about I stay with you while you sleep? The others can go back to the campus and get some sleep themselves."

Rei looked over at Darien who was looking back at her with an intense look. She nodded and stood up without letting go of Serena's hand. "That sounds like a good idea. We'll come back later when you check out."

" Alright," Serena replied nodding her head and squeezing Rei's hand before letting go of it. She smiled at her friends who came over to her and hugged her. Lita took the roses from her and set them on the table next to the bed beside the balloons.

"Have a good sleep," Mina mummered hugging her tightly then followed Rei and Lita out of the room.

"We'll tell your parents to go home and get some sleep," Lita called before the door closed behind her.

Darien watched them leave the room then walked over to the light switch and flipped it off. The room plunged into darkness only lit by the sky turning pink in the distance.

"Do you want me to sit by you?" Darien asked walking back to the foot of the bed.

Serena nodded and settled herself into the bed, pulling the cover up to her neck. Darien sat down in the plastic padded chair and took her hand which she has extended to him. He closed his hands around hers and patted them gently as she closed her eyes. A few minutes later a nurse came in and injected Serena's arm with something to make her sleep. Soon Serena was asleep and Darien was left alone sitting in the light of the rising sun watching her sleep.

Serena pulled on her jeans and zipped up the fly. She had changed out of her hospital gown into the clothes Rei had brought her a pair of blue jeans and a pale green sweater. The medicine was wearing off when she woke up to find Darien asleep in the chair next to her bed still holding her hand. She looked at him, his black hair falling in his eyes while his chest rose and fell while he slept. She smiled and let go of his hand and climbed out of the bed.

In the bathroom she changed into her clothes and looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was a mess of tangles and falling out of her buns. She also looked at the mark on her face, an angry red mark with blue and black shades. She touched it gently and winced at the pain, this would be hard to hide. Instead Serena pulled her hair out of their buns and fingered combed it as much as she could before pulling her hair into a ponytail and winding it into a bun at the base of her neck.

Outside in the hospital room Darien woke up as the doctor came in carrying a clipboard and a bag containing Serena's torn and ripped clothes. She came out of the bathroom dressed in her clean clothes as he asked Darien where she was.

"I'm right here," Serena replied closing the bathroom door behind her.

"Ah there you are Serena. Well we got all the tests back and you are good to go. Is this man going to give you a ride home or would you like me to call your parents?"

Serena looked past the doctor at Darien who was running a hand through his hair to get it out of his eyes. He met her eyes then turned to the doctor. "I'll give her a ride home, we live on the same campus."

The doctor nodded and turned back to Serena. "Here is your clothes Serena. Since you refuse to see the police we can not give them over as evidence." Serena looked at the clothes with fearful eyes but she took the bag and held in her hands.

" Please don't throw them away since they may be called in for evidence against your will if your parents decided to press charges but in the meantime you need to keep them in that bag, so they don't get ruined. Also I would like you to come back in a week for a follow up to see if you are pregnant."

Serena gasped and looked up at the doctor.

"Now don't worry, there is a strong chance that you aren't but we still need to check. Also I would like you to talk to an officer about what happened. Rape is a crime and whoever did this to you needs to be taken in and prosecuted."

Serena shook her head and walked past the doctor. "I don't think that is a good idea. He will know I was drinking underage and that I took drugs. I will be the one to be prosecuted, not him. If it is all the same to you I would rather not talk to anyone, I just want to go home."

The doctor looked at Darien who shook his head slightly. "Alright then but please take detective Johnson's card and when you are ready, please call him." The doctor handed Serena a business card. "In the meantime when ever you are ready just go to the nurses station and someone will check you out. Good luck Serena."

"Thank you doctor," Serena said softly. He nodded and left the room leaving the door open behind him. Serena turned to Darien who reached down and picked up her bag.

"I'll drive you back to school."

"That sounds good," Serena replied heading towards the door with him following her out.

She checked out at the nurse's station, getting her id bracelet removed and her papers signed and filed away. After that she and Darien took the elevator down to the first floor and walked out into the sunshine to his car parked in the parking lot.

"You have a nice car," Serena said as they approached the red sports car.

" Thanks," Darien replied unlocking the doors and throwing her bag into the back seat. Serena climbed into the passenger seat and buckled her seat belt before they took off.

With quiet grace Darien maneuvered the car out of the parking lot onto the street that headed back towards the college. Serena sat in the passenger seat with her arms folded in her lap looking out the front window. Occasionally Darien looked out over the side at her but she didn't look back at him, she was quiet and still only blinking to show that she was even alive. He knew better then to speak so the car ride was quiet until they got to the college and Darien parked in the student parking lot next to her dorm.

"Do you want me to walk you up?" He asked turning off the car and turning to her.

Serena looked away from the front window to him. He noticed the haunted look in her eyes and it didn't disappear when she smiled, a smile that didn't reach her eyes and nodded. "That would be nice," Serena replied.

Darien grinned at her then opened his door and climbed out of the car. Serena did the same thing and reached into the back seat for her bag and the plastic bag of her clothes. She took both without looking at the blood stained skirt and slammed the door shut.

Together Serena and Darien walked into the building and up the stairs to her floor. The stairs were empty of people but on her floor a few people stood in their doorways talking and laughing. When they saw Serena some called out to her asking how the party was and where she was all night. Serena smiled weakly and nodded her head to them. A few people noticed the bag of blood stained clothes in her hand and their greetings died on their lips. As she passed and more people saw the haunted look in her eyes and the clothes in their hands they grew quiet and began to whisper. She didn't notice them but just continued on towards her room. Once there Serena turned and looked up at Darien.

"Thank you for staying with me today and thank you for the ride back."

"It was no problem. I figured you wouldn't want to be alone in the hospital while you were asleep," Darien replied.

"You were right." Serena brushed a stray strand of hair behind her ears as someone turned on their stereo and the sounds of Hobbastank's _The Reason_ entered the hallway.

Darien didn't even turn around to see where the music was coming from he just looked down at Serena who was looking down at the floor. "Are you going to go to dinner tonight?"

Serena shook her head and dropped her hand. "All I really want to do is to take a shower and get some sleep. I think I'll just skip dinner tonight."

Darien nodded his head. "Alright, well I'll let you get some sleep. I'll see you later," he turned to leave but Serena suddenly stopped him by grabbing his hand. Darien turned back to Serena as she smiled at him and tightened her grip on his hand.

"Thank you again for staying with me when you didn't have too. I really appreciate it," she said softly.

Darien smiled and nodded his head. "Your welcome Serena."

"Good night."

"Good morning," Darien replied back then turned and walked back towards the stairs while Serena watched him before unlocking her door and walking into her room.

I know this is short but I'm running out of ideas at the moment so I'm going to end this here and come back in a week to update. In the mean time please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you!


	5. A View of Happiness 5

A View of Happiness

Chapter Five

By A Shot of Amber

Please read and review or send all comments, question, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter Five

" Serena aren't you coming?"

Serena looked up from where she sat on the window sill looking out over the campus and shook her head. " No that's okay, I'm not hungry," she replied.

Rei exchanged looks with Lita who was standing in the doorway then walked over to Serena and bent down to look her in the eye.

" Serena you haven't left the room all weekend. Its Sunday and you are going to have to go to class tomorrow so you might has well come out today."

"What are you talking about Rei?" Serena asked laughing sort of weakly. " I'm just not hungry, that's all. Why eat when you're not hungry?" With that Serena turned away and brushed her hand over her bare arm pushing up the sleeve of her sweater showing where her fingernails had dug into the skin actually drawing blood in some places.

Lita widened her eyes at the marks but Rei didn't see them. Instead Rei sighed and sat down on the window sill next to Serena. " Serena you are hiding and you and I both know it. You know they are not going to talk about you out there. No one knows what happened except us and we are not going to tell anyone so don't worry. Instead you need to let it go and move on. Come to dinner with us and have something to eat, you can't live off nothing."

" Serena be strong! No one is going to point and talk about you. Rei is right, no one knows what happened except us and we are not going to tell a single soul now come on," Lita walked over and grabbed Serena's arm and pulled her up. " You need to leave this room and face the world. Don't be scared! Be strong and you'll realize that nothing can pull you down! Now come on! Let's go to dinner." Lita took a firm hold of Serena's hand and began to pull her towards the door with Rei following carrying Serena's purse and keys.

" I really don't know about this." Serena said pulling back slightly while Lita pulled her forward.

" Relax Serena, nothing is going to happen," Lita replied as they passed some girls standing in a doorway. Serena turned her head to look at them but they only smiled and waved at her. Maybe they didn't know or maybe they were secretly laughing behind her back.

Outside on the quad people were coming back from their weekends at home carrying luggage and book bags full of half done homework. Serena by this time had stopped pulling and allowed herself to be led into the cafeteria which was still relatively empty.

" We picked a time when there wouldn't be a crowd," Rei said handing Serena her purse so she could pull out her ID and swipe for her meal.

" Oh great its meatloaf again tonight," Lita groaned as she saw the menu board.

" Were not skipping dinner tonight," Rei replied firmly taking a hold of Serena's hand and pulling over to the line into the kitchen.

" I know, I know," Lita replied following them into the line while Serena looked back at Lita who gave her a smile and waved.

In the line the girls picked up their trays and got their food before paying and heading back into the cafeteria.

" Where is Mina?" Lita asked has they entered the cafeteria carrying their trays. "She was supposed to meet us in here."

Serena nodded but deep inside her her heart was beating at a fast pace like it could sprout wings and fly out of her breast and then maybe she would collapse and die and not have to go through this. She was afraid, afraid of seeing the world and facing people who could see it all over her face. She was a tainted woman, a dirty tow headed slut.

Wasn't she?

" Hey girls! Over here!"

The girls looked over to the middle of the cafeteria where someone had stood up and was waving to them. Lita smiled and headed over towards Mina stood waving at them while Rei dug her tray into Serena's back and pushed her forward towards the table. Once there Mina stepped over her seat and ran over to Serena to give her a hug.

" I'm so glad to see you out of your room!" Mina cried hugging Serena tightly then let go and smiled at her. " Its really good to see you."

" Thank you," Serena replied setting her tray next to Rei's on the table and sitting down. Mina grinned and went back to her side of the table to sit down.

" I haven't seen you all weekend Serena," Michiru said spearing up a piece of broccoli.

Serena set down her purse on the table and picked up her fork. " I was busy this weekend," she replied softly.

Michiru exchanged looks with Haruka who was sitting across the table near to Serena who began to eat.

" Hey Haruka did you get your car fixed yet?" Lita asked abruptly changing the subject to a safe topic.

Haruka grinned and set down her fork. " Yea I got it fixed at Mike's. Its good as new now, I even took Michiru on a ride to the beach last night."

Michiru blushed and took a sip of her drink. " We did have a nice time there."

The girls laughed and exchanged looks all except Serena who continued to eat without saying anything. Michiru noticed this and set down her drink as did Haruka who stopped eating.

" Hi everyone," Amy said coming up to the table with her tray in her hands.

Mina looked up and smiled at Amy and Darien who came up behind her. " Hey Amy! I was wondering where you were."

Serena looked up also and saw Darien looking down at her with his dark eyes.

" Hi Serena."

" Hi Darien," she replied back.

Rei noticed the look exchanged between the two and smiled as Darien and Amy sat down at the table. She was happy to note that Darien set his tray on the table next to Serena and sat down.

" How are you feeling today?" Darien asked Serena looking over at her.

" A lot better. The headache went away and the doctor gave me some medicine to help me sleep."

" Are you having trouble sleeping?"

Serena looked at Darien and nodded her head. " I did yesterday so I took a pill and slept all day and all night yesterday. I got up today feeling a lot better. The darkness didn't seem quite as pressing when I woke up."

The table grew silent at this remark while Darien just stared at Serena who blushed and looked down at her plate. No one could know and here she was practically broadcasting it to the world including her friends who had no need to know.

Finally Darien cleared his throat and picked up his fork. "That's good to know," he replied.

" Serena are you sick?" Michiru asked.

Serena stopped eating and looked up at Michiru who was staring back with a questioning look in her eyes. The other girls stopped eating to and looked at Serena who looked slightly scared. Finally she swallowed her bite of food and smiled slightly.

" No I'm fine, just a little headache this weekend."

" Then why are you taking medicine?"

Serena once again stopped what she was doing just as the others did. " Well I have a tendency to get headaches so the doctor gives me pills to help the headaches go away but they make me sleepy."

" That sounds like a strong medication," Michiru replied.

" Michiru stop."

The girls including Michiru all looked at Haruka who had spoken up. Haruka set down her fork and picked up her cup. " Just leave her alone Michiru. She doesn't need you prying into her life."

Michiru looked stunned but then she saw the look in Haruka's eyes. Something seemed to dawn on her and she looked at Serena who was looking at Haruka. Michiru's eyes widened as if she saw something.

" Dear lord," Michiru breathed then looked back at her plate. Serena looked over at Michiru who was staring at the food in her plate then at Haruka who was looking at Michiru. Something was going on but she couldn't understand what but a second later that was not important instead something else took control. It was like a steel clamp coming down on her heart and stopping the fluttering to an ice cold stop.

" You have to be kidding me," Darien growled causing her to look up to see what he was seeing. Her throat suddenly went dry as she saw Derek walk into the cafeteria with his buddies looking as threatening as he did in the car. She felt her chest tighten up at the sight of him and quickly turned her head away with fear in her voice.

" Oh god," she whispered hiding her face near Darien's shoulder which seemed to tense up as he saw Derek catch site of them and began to walk towards them.

" What is he doing here?" Rei whispered to Mina while Amy and Michiru looked at everyone's faces which had looks of horror on them.

Derek grinned as he saw Serena hiding next to Darien. He nudged one of his buddies as he came to a stop at the table and set his palms down on it. " Hey Serena. How are you?" Derek asked with a huge grin on his face while behind him his buddies laughed.

" Get out of here Derek," Darien growled standing up and showing his fist.

" Relax Shields. I'm just asking Serena how's she's doing. Hey Serena what do you say about going out with me tonight? We could have some fun again." Behind Derek his friends were crowing with laughter while Serena cried silently next to Darien.

" Derek if you don't leave I'm going to kick your ass," Darien growled again stepping over his seat.

" I need to get out of here," Serena whispered standing up and dropping her fork with a clatter on the floor. She brushed the tears from her eyes then stepped over her seat and ran off out of the cafeteria doors while Derek grinned and watched her go.

" Look what you've done now you jerk," Rei cried standing up also and running after Serena.

Derek just laughed and walked off with his friends who were laughing about "that stupid girl."

Darien growled an expletive and followed Rei out of the cafeteria while the others sat at the table watching him.

" Serena stop!" Rei cried running after Serena who was heading back towards the dorms.

" I can't stop! He's after me!" Serena cried coming to a stop anyway.

Rei ran up to her and gathered Serena in to her arms and hugged her while she cried.

" How could he do that Rei? How could he do that? He told his friends about what happened! He's making fun of me!"

" Calm down Serena. He's not here anymore. He's gone," Rei mummered stroking her hair as Darien came running up.

" Is she okay?" Darien asked coming to a stop in front of them

" She'll be alright," Rei replied as Serena looked up from Rei's shoulder and stepped back.

" Darien why did he tell his friends? Now its going to get all around campus."

Darien sighed and rubbed the back of his head. " He's a bastard Serena. He thinks that can get away with this so he told his friends but we know he can't. Don't let him get to you," Darien reached over and took a hold of Serena's hand pulling her close into a hug. " I'm here for you and so is Rei. You have your friends and we know what happened was wrong."

Serena sniffled and hid her face in his shirt which smelled like cinnamon and smoke, a comforting smell that made her feel safe. " How can I go to class tomorrow with Derek telling everyone what happened?"

Rei stepped forward and placed her hand on Serena's shoulder causing her to look up. " He only told his friend's Serena. That doesn't mean everyone knows. If they did wouldn't they be looking at you and asking questions?"

Serena looked up. " But they are looking! All around me they are looking at me! I'm a dirty girl who will now be known as a slut. I'm a slut because I allowed that to happen!" She burst into a fresh wave of tears and hid her face in Darien's shirt again, her tears making a wet stain on the cotton cloth. " Won't this ever go away? I don't want to feel this pain anymore. I wish I were dead," she whispered her fingers tightening around the fistful of Darien's shirt she held in her hands.

Rei looked up at Darien who was looking down at her over Serena's head. She could see her reflection in his eyes and in that reflection she knew that she saw fear. She could also see a person who was falling apart right in front of her eyes.

That night Serena didn't take her shower, she was afraid to leave her room in case anyone had heard but there were no remarks made in passing her closed door and no one laughed aloud at her. Instead she hid in her room sitting on the ledge of the window dressed in a pair of shorts and her college sweatshirt with her knees drawn to her chest and the light from the closet burning into the darkening room. After dinner she had allowed Rei to walk her back to the room where she faked a smile and said she would be okay. Rei had wanted to stay and sit with her but truth be told Serena would have rather been alone at that time so she shooed Rei out claiming that she was going to shower and get ready for bed. It was early and the sun was out but for some reason Rei believed it and left the room leaving Serena alone.

The first thing she had done after Rei had left was to lock the door and test it to make sure it was locked. She slipped her keys around her neck to make sure they wouldn't get lost then grabbed a baseball bat from her corner near her bed and walked over to the window ledge. It was still daylight outside when she climbed up onto the cold linoleum and tucked her legs in front of her. One hand snaked their way between her thighs to keep warm while the other gripped the baseball bat that hung near the floor in an ever tightening grip. She stayed that way for an hour, sometimes sitting up at the sound of someone walking by and once because someone opened a door across the hall from her room. She actually dropped her legs over the side of the ledge and held the bat up ready and waiting for someone to come through. All the time sweat beaded her forehead and her heart beat a fast tattoo of fear but it passed as the door closed and silence ensued again. After a few minutes Serena loosened her grip on the bat and went back to her old position to watch the sun set. Over the brick building of the campus the sky turned gold then pink then purple while she sat there watching students walk beneath her all in their own happy worlds, all of them happier then her. She could never be happy again.

After the sun had set the darkness seemed to gather around her. Serena at this time was cramped from her long sitting position in the window sill. She let go of the bat only long enough to grab a bottle of pills sitting on her bedside table. Even though it was dark in the room anyone could clearly see the label of the bottle which indicated for her to take one pill a night to help her sleep. Serena twisted open the bottle cap and shook out two pills, small blue and white gel caps that felt smooth in her hand. She set down the pill bottle and picked up a bottle of water. With two swallows the pills were gone and she was swallowing their bitter taste. Tonight she would sleep, without these pills she would be afraid to sleep but they blessed her with sweet assurance, sweet assurance to lie down in her bed and close her eyes with the bat next to her gripped in one hand just in case. For awhile her thoughts swirled around until the pills took affect and she drifted off into sleep never hearing the door open and seeing the light from the hallway pour in.

Rei pocketed her keys and looked at Serena who was lying on her bed fast asleep, the sleep of a drugged person. In her hands the wooden bat was gripped and ready to be used should anything happen. Rei closed the door and looked at the closet light which was still on filling the room with a soft light. Ever since that night Serena had been afraid of the dark and refused to sleep in a dark room. If Rei turned off the light, she had done that the night before, Serena would wake and had woken up screaming. Rei had turned back on the light and sat with Serena to calm her while the blond girl sobbed and cried, her body shaking with fear. Finally she did fall asleep again though only with the aid of a small gel cap to make her sleep. What Rei didn't know was that that pill was the third one of the day for her.

Rei walked over to the closet and opened the door a little wider so the light touched Serena's face then looked out the window at the stars in the sky and the orange lights of the sidewalks.

" God why did you allow this to happen?" Rei whispered softly looking at the innocent face of Serena, or what had been the innocence of Serena. Where was that little girl now?

For a rape victim each day seems to run for a million years until you fall asleep again. That's how it was for Serena, on the first day back to classes she didn't leave her room. She lay in bed long after she had awoken listening to Rei get up and get dressed and leave. Still even then she did not venture from beneath the covers but instead hid, her back to the wall looking across to Rei's bed which was neatly made with white sheets and white coverlet with green leaves on it. Rei always made her bed before she left for classes for the day. Serena on the other hand never made her bed but instead left it haphazardly to make at a later time, now she was to afraid to leave. What if something happened out there? What if someone had found out or could see it on her face? Couldn't you see it on her face? The bruise was still there, she hid it under make up in the daytime but at night you could see it, an angry red mark. There were also scratches on her palms from when she fell, those to angry little red marks causing her to never look at her hands out of pure fear that she would remember. She was slowly teaching herself not to think about anything directly before or after that time. Those two days were fading into pale shadows and would hopefully fade forever from her mind so she would never have to think of them. That's what she wanted, she wanted to vanquish the memory and go back to innocence, just plain innocence.

Down the hall someone had put on an old song, some old R&B song probably from the 50's and 60's. The hallway was quiet because it was so early, most people were singing except for this lone person who played their music for the world to hear. It was a sweet song and before Serena would have loved it but now she saw it has nothing but a pack of lies. Men didn't love women; they used them like a selfish person uses a doll. They may pet and play with them for awhile but when they want they can turn violent and hurt that doll by throwing it against a wall, pinning it to the floor, ripping its clothes, and... Serena shut her eyes tightly and stifled a sob has her thoughts ran away from all sensibility. She could not think of that night, it would kill her to think of that night.

Darien stepped over a laundry basket sitting in the hallway and walked past the open door of a girl still dressed in her pajamas gathering laundry into her arms. From the room music played on the stereo, a mix of old music and of new music such as the song that played now. It was a new tune loved by all the girls, he personally thought the band if they were really a band were a bunch of wimps, he could take them any day. They would just sing to him while he kicked their asses.

Further down the hall her door was closed, it meant she either had not gotten up (I hope not) or she had gotten up and was about to leave (hopefully) or she was already gone with Rei (doubtful), he had seen Rei walk past him alone. Darien walked up to the door which was decorated with stickers and signs saying Rei and Serena's names and dry erase board with their names written on it in a red marker along with various messages: Hey Serena, call me at my ext. – Vicky. " Girls, meet use for ice cream at 3pm – Lita and Mina. " Come to my room to prepare for the party. We need to look hot tonight! – Mina."

Darien read the last message with grim eyes. That had been Friday. Obviously the board had been left alone all weekend. He wondered if Serena had seen that message since she had returned, probably not, she never really left her room or saw anything small. She was locking herself away in her room, hiding herself from the world. Darien sighed and stared at the message before he pulled a tissue from his pocket and touched it to the board wiping away the message until there was no trace that it ever existed not even a smear of red ink. He then crumpled the tissue into a ball and shoved it back into his pocket. The board looked empty without Mina's curvy handwriting taking up half of it and there was a marker hanging next to it...

Without really thinking Darien picked up the marker and un-capped it. He paused for a second wondering with half his mind at what he was doing and with the other half at what to write but one half won and he carefully drew a small heart on the board along with a small message in one corner and signed his name. If she saw this then maybe it would make her smile, it made him smile to see it. With that Darien capped the marker and returned it to its spot then knocked on the door. Inside Serena who had been lying in bed wiping away tears and sniffling to herself looked up in shock that someone was knocking at the door at this early time in the morning. She stole a quick glance at the clock, 8:19 in the morning then back at the door where the person knocked again. Quietly she got up and placed two stocking feet on the floor and walked over to the door the bat clutched in both hands, what if it was Derek pretending to be a friend and she would let him in and he would hurt her again? Oh God! Her heart started to beat faster at the thought has she came up to the door and placed her back against the wood.

" Who's there?" She called in a chocked slightly fearful voice.

Outside in the hallway Darien raised his eyebrows then leaned forward into the door and answered. " Serena its me, Darien."

Serena's heart skipped a beat at the sound of a male's voice then slowed a little at the word Darien. She didn't let go of the bat but instead turned and looked into the peephole of the door confirming that Darien did stand outside the door. She breathed a quick sigh of relief and unlocked the door to let him in. He stood there wearing a blue polo shirt and blue jeans with his book bag hooked over both shoulders looking tall and safe, safer then any other man in the world.

" Come in," Serena said stepping back so he could enter. Darien walked in and turned around to see her closing and locking the door, testing it once then locking it again. He also saw the bat in her hand.

" Serena what is that for"

She looked at him then down at the wooden bat in her hand. " Its for just in case," she replied stepping away from the door.

" Just in case?"

" Yea, just in case he comes back for me because if he does then I can at least protect myself."

Darien looked down at her, he just looked. Her hair was messed up from sleep, she still wore her pajamas and the angry red mark stood out on her face. She stood there holding a wooden bat in her hand and was also trembling as if she were cold but she wasn't, she was afraid. Darien could see all of this in a sweep of his eye, she was like an animal caught in the headlights of a car, afraid of what was to come and afraid of the pain, except she had already seen the pain, now she was just afraid.

He stepped forward, his shoes making a sound on the tiled floor causing her to look up. He stepped forward again and again coming closer to her while she just stood there watching him. Once in front of her he reached down and took the bat from her hand and tossed it onto Rei's bed.

" Darien!" She cried suddenly feeling helpless without her weapon but he stopped her by gathering her into his arms and pressing her against his chest. " Darien!" She cried again as he felt the trembling in her body grow stronger.

" Serena you have to stop this," he replied softly his chin resting on top of her head

' Serena you have to stop this...' seemed to echo through her head. Stop what? Being afraid? How can you stop being afraid when it could happen again? It could be him again or someone else, she wasn't safe from it. She wasn't safe from anyone anymore. She wasn't safe...

" Serena." He tightened his arms around and closed his eyes. He could feel the fear inside her but he wasn't going to let go, he was going to help her. " Serena just let go."

" Let go?" She whispered softly suddenly feeling something loosen inside her. She hadn't really cried over this, sure there were some tears but most of them were locked inside her causing an aching pain deep in her heart and suddenly that pain was gone as the tears came to the surface. She raised her arms and grabbed a hold of Darien's shirt and began to cry, at first just tears but then the sobs started and before she knew it she was full out crying in his arms while he just held her. He never moved has she alternated in letting go of his shirt and grabbing his arms then back to his shirt again. She did this until her tears finally gave out and she was left sniffling and dry in his arms, by this time her temples ached with pain but she did feel better, she felt light in her heart where before there had been a heavy pain.

" How do you feel?" Darien asked lifting his chin away from her hair and looking down into her face.

" Better," she replied reaching up to brush some stray tears from her face.

" Good," he smiled and let go of her for a second to grab a box of tissues on Rei's desk and hand them to her. " Now dry your eyes."

She did so obediently, drying her eyes and blowing her nose before throwing the soggy tissues into the garbage can and turning back to him. His shirt was wet, a dark blue stain on the paler blue. He didn't seem to notice though, he was just standing there looking at her with veiled eyes that showed no true emotion and for some reason she was hooked into his eyes wanting to know what was behind them. They stood that way for a moment until he blinked and looked away taking in the neat and messy room. Rei's side was neat but her side was a mess scattered with clothes falling from hangers and a mess of papers on the desk. He then looked back at her and smiled.

" Are you up to going to class today?"

She widened her eyes at the thought and shook her head.

He nodded slowly then walked over and took her hand causing her to look up at him. " Serena are you going to hide in this room forever?"

" Darien its only been three days! How can you expect me to go out there and face the world so soon?" She cried.

" Because it has been three days and because you can't hide forever." He sighed and pulled her over to the bed and sat down pulling her down next to him. " Serena you may disagree with me but I think you need help."

" I do not need help!" She cried on the defense but he just quieted her and continued on.

" I'm not talking about police help since you obviously will not go the police about this. Instead I want you to get another kind of help, counseling help. You need to talk to someone about this instead of keeping it locked up inside you, all it is doing is hurting you. Your hurting yourself and you need to stop. How can you stand being so afraid?"

" I'm not afraid," Serena replied getting off the bed and walking across the room to her closet.

Darien looked down at the bat that he held in his hand then up at Serena in her short shorts. She was shifting through her clothes, touching each sweater and pushing each hanger across the wooden pole with a scraping sound. Her hands were trembling as she came across a pink shirt neatly buttoned and hanging on its hanger.

" You know I was going to originally wear this shirt to the party but I thought pink was to babyish so I took Mina's blue sweater instead."

Darien watched her has one hand took a hold of the sleeve of the shirt and clutched it into a fist, the skin around her knuckles slowly growing white.

" I wonder," Serena whispered clutching the shirt sleeve harder. " If perhaps I should have worn this shirt then he wouldn't have seen me as such a willing whore. Maybe then I would be happy and safe and sitting in class and not here."

Darien sprang up from the bed and strode over to her. He gently placed one hand on her closed fist and opened it.

" Serena stop."

She looked up at him. " Stop what? Stop being afraid and go back to where I was? I can't do that Darien, I've been taken over by a demon and that demon is taking over my soul. That demon is making the bad things happen and that demon is me. I'm the bad person who is making this happen to me. I brought it on myself."

" Serena we talked about this," Darien replied taking her hand off the shirt and clutching it in his own. " You did nothing of the sort, you never brought this on yourself. No woman brings that on herself, it's the attacker who did this and you must not blame yourself for what happened. You are the victim, not the attacker."

" I'm a victim..." Her eyes seemed to grow large until the black took over the blue. He felt her hand grow limp in his own as she turned away from him and headed for the window. Her hand slipped through his and her bare feet padded over the cold floor. At the window ledge she stopped and looked down at the campus below her, at the people walking around, at the sun shining on the stone benches, at the leafy red and gold trees waving in the breeze.

" Darien?" She reached up and opened the double windows so the breeze could come in and lift up her long hair. " Do you ever wonder if we could just let go of destiny?"

" What do you mean?"

" Once I heard this song and in it the singer was talking about letting go of destiny and just being happy. Destiny held her down and kept her on Earth so she let go of destiny and found happiness away from Earth. She was free of human constraint." Serena placed both hands on the wall around her and climbed up onto the ledge. " After it happened I thought about the song while I was lying in the hospital bed. I thought about letting go of destiny and forgetting about this but its so hard to let go. I feel like something is keeping me down and there is no way out." She inched her knees closer to the edge and looked down at the side walk below them. " But then last night I thought about it and I realized there is way to let go of destiny and be happy." She let go of the wall and pushed the window open wider so that it touched the brick building on either side of her. " You just got to let it go," she whispered leaning forward into the sunshine.

" Serena no!" Darien lunged forward and ran to her. She was just letting go of the windows to fall forward when he grabbed her waist and pulled her backwards. Serena let out a scream as she felt herself being pulled back into the room away from the window and away from her freedom. " Serena I'm not going to let it happen like this!"

" Let me go! Let me go!" Serena cried kicking her feet in the air and trying to escape but he held her tight, her arms locked in his embrace. " Destiny is not going to hold me anymore!"

" What's going on in there? Serena are you alright?" A girl called from outside the door. She turned the knob and opened the door to the scene of Serena fighting to get back to the window and Darien holding her tight. " Oh my god!" The girl cried at the scene.

" Get the R.A. and the school nurse immediately!" Darien yelled over Serena's screams. " She just tried to kill herself."

The girl nodded and ran off presumably towards the RA's room while others streamed out of their rooms to peek into the scene of the screams. A few girls rushed in and tried to calm Serena down while Darien continued to hold her down. A few minutes later the RA ran in to access the scene. She knew what had happened to Serena the night of the party and was under orders to keep an eye out on her. A quick look told her she had not kept a good enough watch. The RA quickly left the room but returned soon enough with another person, a lady wearing a pink flowered dress and a white sweater with short cropped hair. The lady in pink was carrying something in her hand, a syringe filled with a clear liquid. She cleared her way through the crowd and kneeled next to the still struggling Serena.

" Dear this may hurt a bit." With that the nurse injected Serena's arm with the sedative then stood back. " Who was with her when she tried to jump?"

Darien looked up from Serena who was starting to have the drugs take affect to the short stature nurse. " I was."

The nurse met his blue eyes with her own brown eyes and nodded. " I'm glad you were with her. She may not have been so lucky to be alive if she was alone." The nurse turned to the RA, a short heavy set girl with bad skin. " Call 911 and have an ambulance sent here immediately." The RA nodded and walked out of the room while the nurse turned towards another girl who was standing by the closet. " Please pack up some clothes and other necessities for Serena to take to the hospital and you," she looked down at Darien. " Since you obviously know this girl the best then you can stay with her till the ambulance gets here otherwise everyone else out." The nurse shooed the other girls out of the room and closed the door so it was just her and Darien and a sleeping Serena lying on the floor.

Please read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, and flames to . Thank you.


	6. A View of Happiness 6

A View of Happiness

Chapter Six

By A Shot of Amber

Please remember to read and review or send all comments, questions, suggestions, or flames to . Thank you!

A View of Happiness

Chapter Six

' In the darkness I shall find you.

You are hiding inside me.

Let destiny go and you will find me.'

- VNV Nation "Finest Hour Mix"

" How long do you think she'll be in there?"

Darien looked up from his plate of scrambled eggs, which was all he could eat for dinner that night.

" I don't know. Because I'm not related to her I cannot find out anything unless her parents tell me."

Rei nodded and set down her fork. " They won't tell me anything about her either except that she probably won't be back for a few days. They want to keep her for observation for at least a week then its all up in the air. Her mom told me on the phone today that Serena is probably going to drop out of school after this. Its to much for her to keep going so soon after it happened. Maybe next year she can come back but her mom doubts it. She thinks it would be better if Serena transferred schools maybe go somewhere where she doesn't feel threatened as she does here."

" Its so hard to believe that anyone can be affected so strongly by something that happened to them," Mina sighed.

" It affects her because it was a violation of her body and her rights. Look at Serena before this and you would have seen a girl who wanted to fall in love and give her virginity to the one she loved because he would have appreciated it. Now look at the same girl after that night and you see someone who can never fall in love. How can she fall in love when the one gift she wanted to give the man she loved was taken from her in some dark alley by a person who doesn't even have half a heart beating in his chest?" Haruka looked up her tray at Mina. " Look at that girl and you see two different people, a little girl with her heart on her sleeve and a grown women who grew up to fast only because she was forced too."

Michiru who was sitting next to Haruka swallowed her bite of food and set down her fork. She wasn't hungry anymore because in her mind was that picture of the little girl. She could see Serena sitting at her desk sketching that bowl of fruit with her tongue slightly sticking out of her mouth as she drew in the shadows on the apple. She could see Serena sitting under a tree dressed in her favorite pink and white skirt staring up into the sky instead of studying for her math test. She could see Serena the night of the party coming by her room to show off her outfit and saying how she hoped Derek would kiss her that night. Then she saw a different picture, she saw Serena after the rape, she saw the bruises on her face, the shadows of the purple so much like the shadows on the apple. She saw the girl who walked across campus looking wary and afraid dressed in loose jeans and a baggy sweater to hide anything on her body. She saw the little girl and the grown women in two places and in the same person.

Everyone else had more or less stopped eating also has they saw the same picture in their minds. They could see the little girl and the grown women but there was something missing from the grown women, she wasn't happy. She would probably never be happy again.

Darien could see this the most has he set down his fork and leaned back in his chair to look up at the ceiling. Above him on the white tiles the speakers were playing Alicia Keys, the same song that had been playing the day he asked Serena out and the day she met Derek. His mind seemed to flash back over to that week when he had tried to ask her out, when he could have saved her.

'_" Homecoming is really big but so is the party. It's the night after the game. All the brothers are supposed to bring dates and I was wondering if maybe you would like to--."_

_" Oh my gosh I love this song!" Serena cried interrupting him._

_" What song?" Darien asked looking up at the ceiling where Serena was looking. _

_" This song! I love this song! You Don't Know My Name by Alicia Keys."_

_" You interrupted me for a song?" Darien asked incredulity but softly. _

_" What did you say?" Serena asked looking back to him.'_

Maybe he should have said something. Maybe he should have asked her again and again until she said yes. Maybe he should have asked her has friends and not has a date and then maybe he would have the happy go lucky Serena back and not this strange silent shadow that tried to jump out windows and was at this moment sitting in a hospital bed drugged up and alone. Darien sat up in his chair and stood up. " I'll see you guys later, I'm not hungry tonight." He picked up his tray and walked off towards the garbage while the others watched him.

" He seems the hardest hit by this," Lita sighed turning back towards the group.

Michiru nodded in agreement. " That's because he loves her the most."

Darien had held her in his arms while the nurse sat at her desk filling out a report of what had happened. The girl selected packed a bag with some clothes, mostly jeans and sweaters and other items like Serena's toothbrush and her hairbrush. She also packed some pictures and a stuffed rabbit. Maybe it was her girlish notions but she thought it might comfort Serena to have some comforts from home when she went to the hospital. No one on the floor knew what was really going on. After the party on Friday night no one had really seen her. She didn't answer her door when people knocked, she didn't return calls to her phone, when she had been seen she was pale and shaky and there was a bruise on her face that bespoke of something big. The girl could barely keep her eyes off Serena's swollen and puffy face with it bruised eye and cheek but has soon as she finished packing the bag the nurse shooed her out of the room and shut the door leaving her and Darien alone.

After Serena fell into a drugged sleep he had picked her up and laid her on the bed with her head in his lap. Her hair had come undone from its bun and spread itself over his lap, the golden strands over the black of his pants. Even in sleep with bruises on her face she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Darien wished her could gather her in his arms and just hold her tight but he didn't, instead he held onto one of her hands and with the other brushed away her bangs. The nurse who had sharp eyes noticed this but decided not to say anything but instead busied herself with filling out a report of Serena's attempted suicide and what Darien had seen. He knew the nurse knew about the rape so he didn't leave anything out but instead told her everything including how for a minute he had no idea what Serena was doing when she climbed up onto the window ledge and opened the window.

The nurse nodded every once in awhile while her pen scratched its way across the white paper filling in three sheets of carbon copies. One copy would go to the campus office, one to her parents, and one for the nurse to keep. These copies would tell them of what happened so if there were any questions, and there would be, they could come to Darien and ask.

When the ambulance came they pulled up to the front door of the building with their lights flashing. Two men jumped out of the ambulance carrying bags full of medical supplies and a thing of oxygen for when Serena woke up. They rushed up the stairs guided by the RA who had been sent to lead them to her room. Inside one of them knelt by the limp body of Serena and felt her pulse while the other talked to the nurse. All the time Darien was a spectator watching them, like a play with him as the audience member. The ambulance driver who spoke to the nurse, looked over her report and filled out one of his own while the other checked Serena's vitals and asked Darien questions that he answered to the best of his ability. Then all to soon it was over and the tall ambulance driver with the short cut red hair who checked Serena's vitals was lifting her up into his arms while his partner took their bags and the nurse's report. Together the two of them walked out of the room with the nurse and Darien following. In the hallway the girls stood outside of their rooms and watched has the limp body of their fellow classmate was carried past them dressed in her pajamas. Darien was immune to all their stares and the fact that more then one girl said his name into the ear of another girl. He could only see Serena, her head resting on the EMT's shoulder, her blond hair flowing down over his arm to the floor. He could only see the slight tinge of blue around her lips from the sedative. He could only see the shadow of a person.

Downstairs they left the lobby into the bright early morning sunlight. A third partner had the gurney ready covered in a white sheet with two sets of straps hanging free. The EMT carrying Serena gently laid her onto the gurney while the other two fixed the straps and tightened them so she wouldn't slide during the ride. When they were finished and the crowd had gathered and grown bigger they lifted her into the ambulance and closed the doors leaving Darien standing on the sidewalk. The nurse stood next to him just watching has the ambulance drove off, its lights off but still speeding.

" Well young man I suggest you get to class. There isn't anything else to see here," the nurse said turning to him slightly before walking off back towards her office to make the appropriate phone calls. Darien was left standing there surrounded by a crowd of students who looked at him obviously seeing that he was a player in this bit drama but he didn't answer their questions, instead he just turned and walked off headed not for class but instead for his frat house. He didn't want to see anyone at this moment.

That night instead of going to the library like he normally did to study for his classes he spent it in the fraternity house lying on a couch tossing a football into the air and catching it. His head lay on the arm rest while one leg lay sprawled over the back of the couch. He would throw the football up watch it sail through the air then catch and repeat his movements. While he did this he thought about the past week, it was going on a week now. Serena had been in the hospital for three days now and was not getting visitors. Her parents had called Rei and Darien and talked to them both giving them updates about Serena. She was in the mental wing of the hospital and was under strict watch from the staff. She was never allowed to be alone and was on a medication to make her sleep and to calm her down. On her first day there she had woken from her drugged sleep to find herself lying in a hospital bed while some filled a vial with her blood. Serena had started screaming at the site of the needle then she got up and tried to run, perhaps headed away from the nurse who jumped up and grabbed her arm to hold her back. Other nurses streamed in while Serena cried out words of agony and pain talking about how evil the world and more then once screaming at Darien about how much of a jerk he was for not letting her die. Finally a doctor was called and she was given something to make her sleep. She was always sleeping now, the medicine they gave her was very strong, it calmed her mood making her seem listless and quiet. When she wasn't asleep she was in therapy with the others listening to people talk about their lives, each one more complicated then the next. She saw women with stitches on their wrists, she saw men who smoked one cigarette after another while they crossed and uncrossed their legs and talked about people who watched and hurt them. Then there was Serena who sat in the corner by the window dressed in baggy pants and a sweater with her legs crossed and bent at the knee in what her kindergarten teacher had said was Indian style before politically correct terms came into use. She would look out the window or stare at the floor but never talk, she had nothing to say to these people, none of them were going through what she was going. They were happy people compared to her, so she ignored them and refused to meet their eyes. The leader of the group, her therapist would try and draw Serena out but she refused to speak but instead looked out the window at the green grass and at the trees turning red and gold. She would look at the other buildings with people walking in and out of them and at the picnic tables where they sometimes ate in the summer, she would look at everything except the people in the room with her. Finally the therapist would give up and leave Serena alone again and go on to someone else.

After therapy was finished she would leave the room at a fast walking pace and go to the nursing station for her medication. She had learned that it made her sleep so she would gladly take it swallowing down the pill with a small glass of water then lying down on the couch near the nurse's station and falling asleep till lunch. It was this way all the time, everyday she went through the same routine, or at least she did until the third day.

On the third day her dose was cut down. Instead of two pills a day she was given one pill at bed time to make her sleep. The dose was also decreased cutting her sleeping time from twelve hours a day to eight hours. On the first day she lay on the couch waiting for blessed sleep to come but it never did. Instead she lay there hour after hour watching people walk past her muttering to themselves or sitting in groups coloring and talking. When the lunch hour came she ate her chicken salad sandwich at a small table with two other women, an older women who was afraid of large crowds and couldn't function in society because of that and a Hispanic girl who couldn't speak English very well. When you looked at her wrists you could see the fresh stitches from the slash marks where she had cut herself. Serena had noticed them on the first day and cringed in horror. She hated cuts and blood so from that day she avoided the girl so she wouldn't have to see her wounds.

After lunch Serena went to her individual therapy session to talk about her pain or anything else her therapist wanted to talk about. She would answer the questions but never really got into depth about what she was feeling. No one knew what she was feeling, they all thought she was crazy because she tried to kill herself, but she wasn't crazy, she was afraid, she was afraid that it could happen again and that she would have to go through this horror all over again if the current horror ever fades away.

It had been five days since Serena entered the hospital. She was expected to be in there for at least seven days for observation then everything was up in the air. Darien had been relying on the phone calls from Mrs. Tuskino to give him updates on Serena so he was surprised when the call didn't come on the fourth day. It left him worried all night and barely able to sleep but somehow he did because the next morning he woke up groggy and tired with Serena on his mind. Through out the day his mind was a in a fog that left him unable to think and for the first time in his school career he was silent in class and instead left the other students to answer the questions. After school he came back to his frat house to find one of his brothers, a thin intense man who was only in the fraternity because it looked good on a resume on the phone. Darien didn't think anything of it and was headed towards his room when the person on the phone called his name.

" Hey Darien you have a phone call!"

Darien looked down over the railing to see he was holding up the phone. He reached over and took the receiver stretching the cord to its max.

" Yea this is Darien."

" Darien? I'm so glad you got home, were you at class?" It was Mrs. Tuskino.

" Uh yea I was. I just walked in the door. How is Serena?"

Mrs. Tuskino sighed and fingered the cord of the phone. " She is doing better now that she's not sleeping all the time. They decreased her medication to just one pill a day at a low dose. She hates it because it leaves her time, as she says it, to think and she doesn't want that. She would rather be in a drugged haze since she seems to think its nicer there."

" So she's not doing better mentally?"

" I wouldn't say that. She's just afraid more then anything. The doctor says Serena is going through many of the traits a rape victim goes through. She can only get better but its going to take time for her to get better and she needs to work at it. What is it dear?" Mrs. Tuskino put her hand over the receiver has her husband asked her something, their voices slightly muffled before becoming clear again has she removed her hand.

" I'm sorry Darien but Mr. Tuskino wants me to cut this short and tell you why I called."

" What is it Mrs. Tuskino?" Darien asked slipping his backpack off his shoulder and setting it down on the stairs.

" Well Mr. Tuskino and I are headed to the hospital to visit with Serena and we were wondering if you and Rei would like to come with?"

" I thought she could receiver visitors?"

" She can only receive family but she's been asking to have her friends visit so we thought we'd start small and have you and Rei. We want Rei to come because she is Serena's roommate and they seem close and of course you because you and Serena are close. You've been there with her through all of this." Mrs. Tuskino asked her husband something then got back on the phone. " We'll be there in fifteen minutes if you want to meet us there."

" I'll definetly be there but I don't know about Rei, I'd have to find her."

" Well then we'll let you do that and you can meet us in front of the hospital. I hope to see the two of you there. Goodbye Darien."

" Bye Mrs. Tuskino." Darien walked down the stairs and hung up the phone. He was going to see her, after four days he was going to get to see her and talk to her again. Maybe this time he could make her understand. Darien turned and ran back up the stairs grabbing his bag on the way so he could get his keys and find Rei. He wanted to get to the hospital as soon as possible.

The part of the hospital where Serena was staying was located in the older part of the hospital in a red brick building which was much different then the white and green walls of the rest of the hospital. They met Mr. and Mrs. Tuskino in front of the glass doors leading into the lobby. Mrs. Tuskino was a cheerful women with long dark hair tinged now with gray. She gave Rei a hug while Mr. Tuskino shook Darien's hand and thanked him for coming. You could tell both of them were slightly choked up at the thought of seeing Serena in there. Mr. and Mrs. Tuskino had been coming to the hospital everyday since she was admitted but it still scared them to see their daughter looking like a pale shadow of herself sitting across the linoleum tables of the cafeteria watching them as if they might do something. It was scary to see anyone looking like that.

They entered the lobby together and checked in at the desk before being escorted upstairs to the unit where Serena was staying. At the door the security guard took out a small card and slid it through the key pass and typed in a code before opening the door and stepping back to let them in. Darien was the last to enter, following behind Rei. His first sense of the place was the smell, it was a sterile smell like cleaning products. The hallway in front of them was brightly lit with florescent lights and a blue carpet that seemed to glow. They walked down the hall towards the nurse's station past open doors of rooms with beds in them and mirrored dressers. Each room was dark, the curtains were pulled closed over the windows, giving them a look of perpetual gloom. At the nurse's station a blond man dressed in teal scrubs was on the phone but when he saw the Tuskinos he got off and stood up.

" Good afternoon Mr. and Mrs. Tuskino. Serena is sitting at the end of the hall. She's been waiting for you since lunch." The man looked at Rei and Darien. " It looks like she'll have a good visit today." He smiled at Rei who raised one eyebrow at him and turned away.

" Thank you Elisha," Mrs. Tuskino replied nodding to Elisha then taking her husband's arm and walking down the hall towards where Serena was. Darien put his arm around Rei and followed Serena's parents while Elisha watched them before going back to his work at the desk.

Serena had been sitting in front of the window at the end of the hall ever since she had finished lunch. She had dressed herself in her clothes of choice now, a baggy sweater and jeans, her hair was pulled back into her trademark buns and she didn't wear make-up. She didn't in any way want to stand out to people. She was dull and tired looking, nothing like the bright attractive girl from a month ago. Darien self consciously tightened one fist has he saw her, sitting in a cracked red leather chair with her legs stretched out before her crossed at the ankle and resting on the window sill. Her arms were crossed over her chest, the baggy sleeves resting on each other. Mrs. Tuskino crushed her hand to her mouth for one quick second then moved it away and smiled.

" Serena, we are here," she said smiling down at Serena's head.

Serena turned around in her chair and looked up at her parents along with Rei and Darien standing behind them. She blinked once as she focused on two of her friends standing there. Suddenly she smiled, a weak tired smile but a smile never less, and stood up and the shadow of the old person appeared. Serena walked over to Rei who was fighting back tears and hugged her.

" Its so good to see you Rei," she mummered hugging her tightly.

" How are you doing Serena?" Rei asked puling Serena to arms length so she could look at her and smiled.

" I could be better, but I'm doing good. They cut down my medication and it kind of sucks but the doctor says its for the best. He says I can't escape in sleep all the time because I will never be a functioning member of society if I do." She looked over at Darien and smiled wider. " Hey!"

Darien grinned and waved one hand. " Hey."

She let go of Rei and moved over to hug him. " I never got to thank you for everything you did for me."

" It was nothing," Darien replied as he remembered her screams of hatred towards him.

" It is everything," she contradicted looking up at him with serious blue eyes. "You saved my life."

" I did what felt right."

" I'm glad you did. My therapists says I need to thank everyone who has been there for me through this all and you're the one I need to thank the most. Thank you Darien."

He smiled down at her while she smiled up at him until Mr. Tuskino cleared his throat. Darien let go of Serena and stepped back while rubbing the back of his neck has if he was hot. Serena turned towards her parents and smiled at them, her smile becoming wider. She was still like an empty shadow of the person he remember has they walked over to the eating room and sat down at a table. Rei sat next to Rei and gossiped with her about school and what was happening while her parents broke in every once in awhile asking questions about Serena's care and when she expected to leave. Meanwhile Darien sat on the other side of the table at the head of it watching the people around him, all the time lost in his own thoughts.

Serena had her arm through Rei's, her resting gently on Rei's arm while she asked about the going on's of their friends and people living on their floor. Sometimes her eyes would wander over to where Darien sat and look at him but she would always pull them away and look back at Rei or her parents. Darien noticed this but didn't say anything. Instead he would just smile at her when she looked at him and she would smile back. Then Rei begin to talk about how worried everyone was after they found out about that day and how Darien was the most worried. Serena at this time looked away from Rei's face to Darien who was resting his chin on his crisscrossed hands and looking down at the table top. She blinked once and bit down on her bottom lip. Her hand slipped away from Rei's arm and she stood up bringing Darien out of his revere.

" Darien can I talk to you?"

He looked at her with her serious blue eyes looking down at him and nodded. " Of course Serena." He stood up and followed her out of the room down the hallway and past the nurses station where Elisha sat working on some paper work. He looked up as Serena passed with Darien behind her but she didn't turn her head and Darien just barely acknowledged him. They walked back to the window where Serena had sat waiting for them, a small alcove with two blue curtains hanging on either side of them. She stepped into the alcove and pulled the curtains closed behind them so they were in this small space of sunshine. Serena sat down on the window sill which was just big enough to allow her to sit down with her legs touching the floor. Darien looked behind him then pulled up the red chair Serena had been sitting in when he got there.

" I don't really know how I'm ever going to thank you for what you've done for me. I mean out of all my friends you've been the one who is always there for me Darien."

Darien smiled and leaned forward to rest his arms on his knees. Serena crossed her legs at the ankle and leaned back against the window.

" I never really expected that something like that could happen to me. I thought it only happened to trampy girls who asked for it and I'm not trampy, I'm pure or at least I was."

" You still are."

" No I'm not Darien, I'm marked with the sin of what happened to me but I can hide it or at least that's what my therapist says I can do. I need to hide and stop showing people that I'm dirty and letting everyone know. Rape," she swallowed and looked at her hands, " is a dirty thing that happens to more people then you could ever suspect. Most women never even show that they were raped and I want to be like that. I don't want to show anymore that I'm a victim. I don't want to be like Nicole a girl I met here who is also a rape victim and makes it known to everyone. She is constantly talking about the horror she went through and every time she does I have to leave the room with my ears covered by my hands because I don't want to hear it. I'm tired of hearing that awful word and she says it all the time like it's the only thing she can say. I was raped, pity me and feel sorry for me!" Serena let go of the window sill and gestured her hand through the air. I'm tired of listening to someone who acts like their raping was a walk in the park on a sunny day because its not, its being alone in a tornado and having nothing to hold on too." She looked down at Darien and smiled. " I think the reason Nicole looks for pity is because she doesn't have one person to protect her. Her mom is a drug addict and she doesn't know her dad so she turns to perfect strangers and makes them listen. Me," she pointed to herself. " I have more people then I know what to do with, I have my parents, and my friends, and of course you."

Darien smiled. Serena smiled and for a moment the outside world disappeared around them except for the sun shining in through the window.

" You know I'll always be there for you Serena."

" I know." Serena scooted back on the window sill so her toes were the only thing touching the floor. She sighed and looked down at the blue carpet. " I'm sorry I was so rude to you that time you asked me to the party at your frat house. I was so eager to have the most popular and hottest guy on campus that I walked into fire without knowing it and got burned because of it. I should have gone with a person I could have trust, a person who would have treated me like a lady and not a thing." She looked up at him. " I should have gone with you Darien."

" Serena if I had known this was going to happen I would have handcuffed you to my wrist and dragged you with me to the party but I didn't know. I thought Derek was more of a man then that but I was wrong about that. I'm just sorry that I gave him more credit then he deserved."

Serena grinned. " He's scum."

Darien laughed. " I agree with you on that one but Serena if you step forward and report him you can wipe out that scum and he'll never do it again."

" Yea but it would be reopening new wounds," Serena replied. " I don't know if I ever want to live through what I went through ever again."

" Yea but do you want some other girl to go through it?"

Serena widened her eyes slightly. " Is he?"

" Not right now, he's keeping it low just in case but there is always the chance that he'll do it again. He's probably feeling that he can do it again because he knows you won't come forward and report him."

" But its been almost a week now…"

" Yes but you can still report him, you have the evidence and so does the hospital. All you need to do is fill out a report and begin the process to bring the scum down."

Serena looked away has she thought about the bag of clothes hidden in the bottom of her clothes bin. She hadn't touched them since she put them there, they were sealed tightly in plastic so they couldn't touch her other clothes and ruin them.

" You kept the clothes, didn't you?"

Serena looked away and didn't say anything; she could still see the blood stained clothes lying on the bottom of the white plastic bin.

" Serena?"

" I was afraid to throw them away for some reason so I kept them, just in case I could become strong enough to bring them in."

" You are strong enough now," Darien reached over and grabbed her hands tightly in his own. " Serena you are strong enough to end this cycle of pain inside you and you are strong enough to stop Derek from hurting another girl. Rape is a serious offense that can be stopped if you help to stop it." He tightened his already tight grip on her hands. " I just don't want to see you get hurt anymore."

Her face was bathed in sunlight from the window which she looked out of. Her hands were clasped in Darien's and for the first time she didn't cringe at his touch or any males touch, she instead felt something akin to safe. For the first time in a long time she felt truly safe and somewhat like her old self. She felt strong again.

" Darien?"

" Yes Serena?"

" I get out of the hospital tomorrow. Would you take me to the police station? I want to fill out a report."

Darien smiled. " I'll do whatever you need me to do Serena."

She smiled and looked at him, straight in the eye. " Thank you," she replied.

" Your welcome," he replied then stood up and pulled her up into his arms. She came willingly and hugged him tightly, her hands gripping the soft cotton of his shirt before they both let go and opened the curtain to leave their sunny little world and enter the regular world again.

Darien waited for her downstairs in the parking lot while she retrieved the bag from her dirty clothes bin. She stood there for a moment looking at the crumbled blue sweater and the black sweater then wrapped it up in a black garbage bag so she wouldn't have to look at it during the car ride to the station. Rei wasn't in the room, she was in class. Serena closed the door to the empty room and walked down the stairs and out the door to where Darien stood by his car.

" Ready?" He asked.

" Yes," she replied clutching the garbage bag tightly in her hands.

He opened the door for her and she slid in, letting the garbage bag rest on her lap. He shut the door then walked around to his side and got in. The car ride to the station was quiet has she let her thoughts take a hold of her and he allowed it to happen. At the station he parked his car and she climbed out, the detective's card now in her hand. Darien came to stand next to her and together they walked into the police station with his arm just gently resting on her waist. At the front desk Serena stepped up alone and set the bag on the desk top.

" Can I help you miss?"

" I would like to see detective Johnson. I'm here to report a rape."

The End.

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